Because I am a Lazy Bitch...

Okay, so here's the deal.
I haven't made a post in at LEAST two weeks, and I'm really really sorry.

Not like any of you really care if I make a post today, tomorrow, or next month, but whatever. I should be more responsible and quit being lazy and write my stuff. I just should.

I have nothing to talk about tonight, so here's the deal. I'm just here to let you know that I am still alive and haven't forgotten about my little blip of the inter-webs.

*I finally got my Eden Fantasy's assignment toy last week, and am currently working on the review for it. It's my first authorized free-toy review, so I want it to be awesome. I'll let you know when that's up and give you a different spin on it.

*I haven't read any good sex books lately, mostly because I'm just sort of sexed out. I still love to talk about it, give advice, and learn about it, but reading about it takes too much damned effort.
I'm currently reading the fourth book in the fictional series Kushiel's Legacy, which is a series with a lot of sex in it (and its just plain fucking awesome), but no new memoirs or instructional books at the moment. Money's hopefully going to be better this semester, so maybe that'll change soon enough. A book on sensual massage would be good. Right?

*I haven't had a Position up in for-fucking-ever, so I'll try to get one up within the next two weeks. Summer's just been really really weird and busy and miserable, but maybe the fall will bring back a little bit of my libido.

*Did I ever mention that I think I figured out my orgasm problem? Well, I think I did. It's a little bit of a biological, physical mishap, and I'm hoping a good GYN will help me fix it. More on that another time.

*I'm currently looking for Guest Bloggers for Sin's Secret. With how busy I'm going to be this semester, I'd love to have a couple guests put in some input. Whether it's my wonderful fellow bloggers that I love so much, or just a reader who has something he/she feels should be included. It could be a full article or whatever you'd like. Just email me (sinsekret@gmail.com) and let me know if you're interested. We can work something out.

I think that's all for now, really. Should have the Toy Review up on Wednesday, and have more news and interesting stuff up by the weekend.

<3
Sin

Entitled to Sex? or "Fuck Him"; An Unorganized Bit of Theory on Female Evolution

Our society has somehow created a male mentality that they are entitled to sex. That they need it, deserve it, and shouldn't be denied it.

In high school boys only want girls if they'll put out. Once they do, they're used, dirty, slutty. Yet if they don't, they're prudish, teasing bitches. This trend doesn't really end after high school, it just goes on in different ways.

Case in point, my friend G recently tossed a guy who, after less than a few weeks, called her a cunt because she wouldn't have sex with him.

I'm not exactly what you'd call a raging feminist, but there are parts of our society that you can't deny, including the superiority men have had throughout most of our "civilized" history.

One of the worst products of that superiority, it seems to me, is the male viewpoint that sex is their right. I have no idea how this really came about, but it is one of the top things I blame for high incidences of rape as well as the Madonna-Whore idea, and women's inability to be sexually equal to men.

We have created every aspect of male mentality. Every sexual thing men think, we as a society have put there. We've taught men that they should be hunters. Why? More than likely, any primal society would have had both men and women hunters because everyone would have had to be put to work. Yet this mentality that men have to be in control is still there, because our past societies have put it there. Then there's the idea that men NEED sex, we put it there! Men don't need sex any more than women do, but we've given them this huge gap of logic when it comes to this area. Why?

There's no denying that women have different sex drives than men nowadays, but maybe that's society's fault too?

Perhaps women have been dealt the low hand in evolution. Maybe once upon a time women were as sexually active as any man standing next to them, because they got the same strong, evident urges as men do now, and were pleasured just as easily, were considered just as sexual.

When the more dominant patriarchal societies came along, and got more and more powerful, our sexuality became less needed. Over time as women were more and more often considered sexual objects instead of sexual beings (even, and especially, in religiously dominated societies such as the Christian Europe and Muslim Middle East), we had less and less use of our sexual pleasures, and evolution gave up on us.
While men continued to grow sexually, women were stunted. Sexual pleasure was no longer a value to women, it was a deformity, it became a liability and Mother Nature said "Well, if you don't want it..." and now women (while we still have sex, want it, and enjoy it) just aren't to par with male sexuality.
Part of that is in our mentality, yes, just like mens sexuality has been warped with myths about needed and deserving sex, ours has been tainted with thoughts of immorality and romance over sexuality. But that mental stunting wouldn't change so much of our physical inadequacies, would it?

Think I'm wrong about the inequality?
It could take a woman up to an hour to have a single orgasm, and not even through intercourse, while it takes most men ten minutes. I'm not saying the ridiculous stereotypes of women not needing or enjoying sex like men do are true, but there is a definite unbalance between the two which I think wasn't always there.

No matter how much we strive to own our sexuality. To love our bodies and take hold of our own orgasms, we've still been dealt the short stick.

FYI, we made 1327 hits in June!

Position of the Week $

Currently Watching: The Secretary :: Starring Maggie Gyllenhaal & James Spader

This weeks position is: "The Rising"
Also called Right Angle Position, The Yawning.

In movies and porn you often see couples going at it in something like missionary, but with the womans legs against the guys chest, her high-heeled feet dangling behind his back. This is something like that, but just a little bit more complex.

Directions:
Here the woman lies on her back, the man standing on his knees in front of her. He grips her legs and she supports herself with her hands above/behind her on the bed or headboard as he lifts her legs up and rests them against his body, her ankles on either side of his head. The woman now should have her hips off the bed/ground, and both her legs firmly against the mans body, with their pelvises in line with each other. The guy can hold her legs either at the ankle, knees, or thighs, but preferably her hips while her legs rest inside his elbows, and he penetrates in this position. Traditionally, he should move in "slow circular motions" while she stays still.

So lets talk about this one, one gender at a time.

Guys: You're probably going to love this. Probably. Despite the work it takes to get everything situated, the depth of insertion here (according to W) is fantastic. The womans vagina is shortened a little bit, so your penis goes all the way in, and completely "fills" her.
There's little effort on your part really, except for the fact that your standing on your knees, which can get tiring after a while. And here you have almost total control over speed, pressure, and depth.
"It was hard to keep a grip, but the angle of penetration was...nice. It felt good. It felt open." -W


Ladies: You...might like this. If you have decently strong abs, don't get tired too easily, and don't mind your legs falling asleep halfway through, sure.
The angle isn't uncomfortable once you get used to it, it's just a bit odd the first time, so comfort isn't a really a problem here. Except for your legs... But if you're really into it, my negative comments can be thrown to the wind, because all this one really takes is practice.
The angle does give lots of space for a decent view, or for a vibrator to slip in and give you an extra boost when wanted.
I bet this also burns twice as many calories than regular missionary, simply because of how your fighting to keep up your hips. A great ab workout. Mix that with the good vibrator area, and you've got yourself a pleasurable-and productive- time. ^-^
Although you should definitely skip this one if you have neck or back problems.


I have to say that this is one worth trying, at least, especially if your willing to do the practice ("make research", as W says quite often). I only tried it once, and only for a little while, and because I definitely don't have the abs to hold myself up like that, my personal discomfort shouldn't deter you from at least trying it next time you hop into bed. If you're looking for something new and interesting, this should be on your list.

The angle and depth alone make it worth trying, if only for the guy, and if your the adventurous type, it's pretty cool just to be able to say "Yeah, I did that one". So I say give it a shot.


Tried it? Loved it? Hated it? Found one better? Let me know! Email me at Sinsekret@gmail.com or AIM me under SinSekret.

Sorry no erotica this time, but I've got the next one almost done (already!), and there is a short story, and it's by W, so it's something different.
By the way, we've hit over 1,000 hits so far this month! Fucking awesome!!!

Related Posts: PotW #-Reverse Cowgirl, PotW @-Doggy Style , PotW !- Lotus,

Sin on News

Some news stories today that BUG me:



Shakopee heeds parents' concerns on sex-ed course

Okay. No. There is no - and I mean NO- logical reason for kids not to learn about sex. Seriously. The time for sexual morality is OVER. Sex is biology. Sex is nature. Sex is going to happen whether we like it or not. Parents can't normally opt their kids out of Biology, or let them skip European History, so their friggin body's sexual DEVELOPMENT class should also be REQUIRED. There is no LOGICAL reason why it shouldn't. People should know their bodies, and that's that.
The fact that they're segregating the sex ed classes is just a laughable after thought for me. Separating boys and girls in a sixth grade class only perpetuates the idea that boys and girls are unequal and sex is something dirty and secret. And I think it's just silly.

Next.

Pharmacies Should Be Allowed To Refuse Contraception...

Nothing so wrong with this post. But it revealed the fact that some Pharmacies refuse to fill contraception orders. Wait, what? No, really, WHAT? Okay, what they say about upholding their own morals without pushing them on other people is great, really, but not filling contraceptions? Not holding condoms? What if they're the only Pharmacy in town? Ick. I don't like this. But yet...it's not all bad. I guess.

Secrets in the Suburbs: I'm a Dominatrix

This...is awesome.
That's all I have to say.
Go you, Mrs. Dom-Mommy.


Oh! And did I mention that Gay Marriage is legal in California? Finally!


W is currently trying to get me to "make research", being that I haven't posted a Position of the Week in for-fucking-ever. (I'm saying fuck a lot tonight; sorry, I'm just in that -fucking- mood.) So I'll go. For science. Yeah, right.

Before I go, four things I realized today.

1. Simba and Nala had sex in the Lion King.

I know, I know; either What the Fuck? or Duh... but for some reason this never occurred to me, but dawned on me suddenly at work as Can You Feel the Love Tonight played.

2. I haven't done a post here about books yet, so I really should. ASAP.

3. The new Doctor Who episodes are better than sex. Period. Seriously. Way better than any sex you could possible have. Unless...no, never mind.

4. I haven't written anything of worth lately. I really do feel bad, I swear. But I'm back from my sad excuse for a "va-kay" and don't work again till Wednesday. So I have three days to force myself! And by force myself I mean be completely lazy until someone actually tells me I should do a new post so I feel like anyone cares. ....... .....

A Personal Message...

Currently Reading: Sleeping Around: Secrets of a Sexual Adventuress by Catherine Townsend

Reading the Sexual Memoirs I love so much, I've started feel a bit down. I feel sort of disconnected; like I'm trying to measure up to these writers but inevitably can't.
Not because they know more, or because they're older or more successful, but because of their infamously long "lists".

I, with my total of four sexual partners, cannot compete or compare with a published writer with more than fifty men under her belt. (Why I envy these women in the future post on Casual Sex and Promiscuity.)
And while W and I have talked about and considered considering bringing a third party into our sexual activities, we are both still nervous about the idea. And it's a bit hard to hope for our relationship to succeed when I envy those with more past lovers than me, and wish I were one of them.

I don't feel that quantity of experiences has a dramatic effect on quality of knowledge. I know what I need to know, what I want to know, and I try to know more to help myself and others. But here it doesn't matter what I think, it matters what you, the reader, think. So here I am, asking you myself.

I don't have loads of hilarious sexcapades to share with you, nor sexual wisdom gained over years of trial and error.
What I do have is my ideas. My opinions. My knowledge; gained through limited experience, extensive reading, late night conversations, and occasional research. My body; the way it feels and behaves. My life; the few experiences I have had, as well as those of my closest friends, lovers, and strangers.

I can't always be funny, and I can't always be smart, but I will always try to be both and more.

Do you think that's enough?

ABCs of Sex

Currently Reading :: Sex and Sensibility

Thank you to Bell (her new personal blog is HERE, by the way) for her ABC idea. She tried to get me to do it a month ago, but completely forgot until she did her own. <3>

A. A is for Apple.

I could have chosen Ass, Anal, or Asphyxiation, but no, I chose apple.
The Original Sin.
The crucial piece of evidence against poor, beautiful, sacred Eve.
A historical image of the mixture of nature and sex.
Crisp, delicious, and bright, sexy breezer red.


B. B is for Boobs.
These joyous orbs of love have been a symbol of sexiness for more years than just about any sex symbol, and in all those years men have given life, limb, gold, and gods to ogle them, feel them, taste, tease, and squeeze them, and made them an endless source of pain, pleasure, and annoyance to women everywhere.

C. C is for Clitoris.
And condom. And cock.
But lets stick to the important one.
The clitoris is the female sex organ that runs underneath the sides of the labia and up out of the tip, and (all together) is about the size of the average penis.
Bet you didn't know that.
This luv nub has one purpose and one purpose only; to create pleasure for the body it resides in.

D. D is for Dildo.
And Dick.
But their pretty much the same thing.
The great thing about a dildo is that it works just as well (if not better) than any dick out there, and doesn't have the asshole attached to it (read however ye will). The downfall, however, is that it can't cuddle with you or buy you expensive shit.

E. E is for Erection.
Useful for late night booty calls, not for early morning biology classes.
Fun to play with, occasionally fun to look at, and supposedly feels like "having an extra finger stretched out in your pants, taking the best feeling stretch in the world."
Whatever.
Erection=(masturbation X coming)^2

F. F is for Fuck.
Once was the only "curse" word I refused to say. I had this theory about it being the only curse word that actually began as a bad word (versus bitch, ass, and damn, which were their own words first), so it was the only one that shouldn't be said.
But then I changed my mind.
Is now my favorite word. (Right next to Quixotic)
Has a beautiful, harsh, sharp sound to it.
Mmmm...fuck....

G. G is for Geisha.
Beautiful images of the East, these represent both the beauty of female sensuality, and the traps of masculine rule.
Not the Asian whores we tend to classify them as, geisha were meant to be the perfect woman.
Quiet, beautiful, mysterious, and subservient.
Sex was not normally involved (until a certain point), but they were meant to be everything the men they served wanted.
Serving them, laughing at their jokes, praising them.
The stuff real women wouldn't do, so the guys have to pay for it.
Much like todays hookers, who men go to for their kinks.

H. H is for Hell.
This is apparently where I'm going.
I told my mother recently that I think one of her very christian friends hates me, and she said "No, I think she's just worried for your eternal soul."
But eternity is a very long time. And if I'm going to burn in it forever anyways, I might as well enjoy what I've got while I'm not tiptoeing over the flames.
But don't get me wrong, religion is very important for us stupid little mortals.
I, myself, am very religious, very spiritual.
You need something to have faith in. To believe in wholeheartedly. To follow brainlessly. To always defend and never really think about. To justify your prejudices with. To kill people for.
That's what religion gives you. That special something to believe in.
I believe...
in love.
Love is all you need.

I. I is for Innocence.
That imaginary attribute that people put so much value into.

Most modern girls hold onto their "virtue" for dear dear life.
While boys leave theirs in the dust as soon as possible.
Unfortunately, statistically, this can't work quite right unless that female virtue is lost one way or another.
Usually another, involving coercion and heartbreak.
This is typically accepted.

J. J is for Jizz.
......eeww.
Never mind.

K. K is for Kisses.
The most average, simple, and acceptable form of sexual expression.
A small motion made with your mouth.
That's it.
You kiss your friends. You kiss your siblings. You kiss your children. You kiss your parents. You kiss your lovers.
But hopefully not in the same way...

L. L is for Lesbian.
A woman who is attracted to and has sex with other women (exclusively).
While some choose the definition of a woman who ever has sex/ is attracted to women as a lesbian, I say it's only the ones who only like women, and not men. To me sexuality is lucid, so I keep to my own definitions.
Anyway.
Almost every man's fantasy; watching two girls have make out.
Why?
Who the fuck knows.

M. M is for Masturbation.
Self Love.
Jacking Off.
Jerking Off.
Wacking Off.
Jilling Off.
But really, haven't we've talked about that enough this month....

N. N is for Night.
Nighttime has often been associated with mystery, sin, and sex.
Nighttime is fun time, and nowadays all the best things happen at night.
Usually.
Even taco bell is open later to accommodate us night owls.
Usually, sexual activities occur at night.
But it's definitely not limited to it, not in the least.

O. O is for Orgy.
The more the merrier.
I actually only personally know a few people who have orgies, and sadly they're all old, semi-loser pseudo hippies, and I'd never want to see them naked.
But people fantasize about it all the time.
As if one lover to please wasn't hard enough.

P. P is for Porn.
Anal. Oral. Bondage. Rape. Orgy. Lesbian. Dick. Cunt. Pussy.
Hot. Squirting. Massive. Kinky. Throbbing. Barely Legal.
Combine any two or more of these nouns and adjectives, and you've got yourself a porn title/description.
I was once aroused by certain rough pornos and hentai, but that went away after a batch of really really really bad ones. Now they don't interest me at all.
But that doesn't stop the rest of the world.

Q. Q is for Queer.
The term (usually derogatory) used in reference to gay men.
Not women, they don't get the cool sounding word.
Also goes along with Queen, as in Drag Queen.
I suppose.
Queer guys are usually fun, adorable (even if more through personality than appearance), and know more about fashion and fun than you do.
But that's just the stereotype; it can't be close to true.
Right?


R. R is for Rough.
Some like it hot, some like it rough.
From bondage to sadism to asphyxiation to domination.
Whatever floats your boat.

Tie me up, pin me down.
Scratch my back, bite my neck.
Rule me.
Excite me.
Collar me.
Spank me.
As long as you
Like me.


S. S is for....me!
No. Really.
S is for Secret.
Throughout much of average people's lives, sex and their sexual activity is kept a secret.
From quickies in the bedroom while the 'rents are watching TV,
to hookers during a lunch hour,
to hiding your homosexuality,
lying about where you were last night,
and a keeping a secret closest full of sadomasochistic play equipment.
Unfortunately society makes us keep our sexual expression under wraps.
Silent.
Secret.
Safe.

T. T is for Testicles.
Like the boobs, testicles are jiggly little orbs of sex.
Unlike the boobs, they are rarely any fun to look at.
Often, however, they are fun to play with, if you're in the mood.
Creates and holds the sperm that will one day end up in a tube sock, napkin, condom, rectum, or some woman's baby oven.

U. U is for Uterus.
Which is actually a pretty scary word.
Female sex organ where babies grow.
I heard a joke once about how men spend nine months getting out of the vagina(/uterus), and the rest of their lives trying to get back in it.
Not much else to say about this.
Gets really fucking big when a womans pregnant.

V. V is for Vibrator.
The fun toys of the sex world made specifically for women's sex spots (and men's too sometimes).
Used mostly for the clitoris nowadays, with special ones shaped for the G-Spot, these are my favorite bedtime accessory.
No need for men. No need for time.
Just put this thing anywhere near your vagina (or anus/perenium for you guys) and your ready to go.
Plus, if you ladies can't orgasm during intercourse, try rubbing this one around on yourself during intercourse.
You wont have problems for long.

W. W is for Wedding.
For many many years, this was the first time most women would have sex.
Which is kind of sad, when you think about it.
This has been made throughout history to be the goal of womens life, and the end of mens.
Women, even today, spend their whole lives searching for "Mr. Right".
Or as Sex & the City has called him, "Mr. Big.
It's also sparked lots of controversy when it comes to gay marriage.
But really, how silly can you get? There is no logical reason for gay people not to get married.
I have little desire to get married.
It's a romantic gesture, and provides some interesting legal rights,
but really, it's unnecessary.

X. X is for X-Rated.
This was once the highest content rating a movie could get.
It pretty much meant that a movie was inappropriate for children.
Since the 90's its been replaced by the NC-17 rating, and is no longer actually used in the US,
while porn has inherited it for their shock value.
I like NC-17 movies better.

Y. Y is for "Yaz"
I didn't do a letter for condoms or contraception, so lets cover it real quick here.
Yaz is the birth control pill that I use.
I like it, and so far it's worked (I also always use condoms).
Yaz is one of many many many many many different brands and kinds of hormonal birth control.
You should try one.
I always stress the importance of contraception.
So here.
This is me stressing it.

Z. Z is for
...
you didn't really expect me to come up with a sex word for Z, did you?

Sorry I've been so out of it lately. I just haven't felt like writing, so I haven't. But being that I just got a new (real) job, and have been really busy, and I don't actually get paid for this blog, I think I deserve a week of laziness. I'll try to catch up quick though, so keep checking back for new stuff.

You Oughta Know...

Just so you know, I have not disappeared, I am just a bit lazy this week. I used to have the problem that I didn't have enough ideas. Now I have too many ideas and I just can't seem to finish any of them. But I'm workin on it.


Here's a list of the articles coming up, in the order they'll hopefully be. So make sure to check back soon ^-^

This Weekend:
1. The ABCs of Sex [hopefully today or tomorrow]
2. Position of the Week [Sunday or Monday]

Next Week:
3. With a Little Help From My Self (final masturbation post)
4. A quick list of book reviews

The Week After Next:
5. One Night Stands and Casual Sex
6. Adult Product Review (the new KY) [maybe next week if I use it sooner]

Future Ideas:
* Sensual Massage as Foreplay
* "Eating In while Eating Out" - The uses and messes of Food in Sex
* Checking the Back Door - Love and Controversy in Anal Play


Don't forget to let me know if there's anything you think I should do more of, a topic I haven't covered that you'd like to see, any questions you'd like answered or situations you want advice on, or... whatever!

<3
Sin