Sunday, November 30, 2008

Mini Rules :: by Kay

Once again I'd like to point out a few things about Kay's writing. Specifically, her need to retain control in an environment typically meant for the opposite. I think it's interesting and points out more of her more contradictory thoughts. It's a kinda neat piece though. I'm not going to say anything at the end, so don't forget to check out Kay's blog, A Life Beneath. ~Sin

My mini rule book

By Kay

I have a session from Sunday that I still need to post about, but it was only like an hour and it wasn't very interesting, so my motivation for typing it up is not very high right now. I have another session tonight so I think I may just post them together...I'm hoping this one has more juicy details than Sunday's...

At any rate, some things were running through my head and I figured I should post them here to a) get them out and b) give you all a little insight into some of the things I think about when approaching sessions.

I still have a good 9 hours before mine tonight, but it's very obviously resting heavily on my thoughts. Why wouldn't it be? And I was already considering what I wanted to wear. I realize, now, that I have a certain set of ground rules. Granted, these only work on a Master without a dress code.

1) I always try and be as dressed as I can be at any given moment without being obvious. This keeps me in some amount of control. So I never go without a bra and underwear and I always wear jeans to keep my legs completely covered for as long as possible. Shirts aren't as big of a deal. I tend to just go with whatever I feel like wearing.

2) I always wear cute or sexy underwear. It's important to be proud of every piece of clothing you are wearing, especially as your Master will more than likely see it all. I've actually found some outlets that can carry really great lingerie if you hit them at the right times. And you'd be surprised what you can find in Wal-Mart. So trust me, there is no need to spend big. (Although I would recommend owning at least one thing from Victoria's can't beat some of the stuff you find there.) However, as a general rule I don't do thongs, as pertains to the rule above.

3) I always dress in something that makes me feel confident. This way, I can stride into his house with a purpose. And you can never go wrong with a good pair of high heels.

4) I always make sure I wash my hair thoroughly because my Master likes to twist his hands through it and I can't have it getting oily quickly. As a general rule here, I never wear my hair up so that he can do as he pleases when I get down there.

5) If you shave...anywhere...shave well. I don't care how many times you have to examine your legs to find a single stray piece of hair. Just remember a Master will be very familiar with their submissive's body and you don't want to realize too late that you missed a patch on the back of your leg.

6) Lotion is a good idea. It makes the body smooth and sleek and takes away any ashyness or unsightly spots. And as is sometimes the case with me, it can ease razor burn if you attack your leg a bit too enthusiastically.

That's all for now.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Happy Turkey Day everyone!!!

I love finding sexy chick pics online ^-^

Eat lots, use condiments!

Adam & Eve Adult Sex Toys

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Not Quite the Sex Industry, But Maybe It's A Gateway Job?

Finally! A post three months in the making!!

On my search to gain new experiences (and more money), I recently took on the job of a "life model" for the art classes at the local University.

I signed up a year ago, but they'd already filled the position. Over the summer, I received an email offering me the job for this semester.
I jumped at the opportunity without even thinking about it. $12 an hour; fuck yeah!

When I did start to think about it, I realized how absolutely terrified I was. Stripping down so that a class of people I didn't know could sit there and draw me suddenly loomed over me. Because that's what I'd be doing. I couldn't sleep, and I spent the three days up until my first class so nervous I was practically shaking.

The morning of my first class, I woke up early to be there by 10:55. I had my bag packed with my crappy, fuzzy, super short robe (courtesy of my mother far too long ago), my only pair of flip-flops, and a towel (someone recommended I bring one, but I'm still not sure why). I didn't have a lunch, anything to drink, or (what I found out later I'd need) any female accessories.

So I showed up, met the teacher, changed into my teeny tiny robe, and sat around as the class filed in.
I quickly realized two things about my current state. I was A) terrified, and B) cramping. Shit. I kept thinking about my new birth control pills (I had just started my third month of Seasonale), and when I was supposed to get my period. But, as I was trying to keep my sunny I-Think-I-Can disposition, I popped some pills and kept my mind off of it.

After shakily pulling off my robe- which is, I swear, the worst part- I was feeling pretty okay. My hair was twisted up in a pencil (I think it looks best that way), my stomach was flat and lean from not getting the chance to eat yet, and I didn't have a single thing on except some dark eye makeup (also something I feel sexy in).
Shit, even thinking about it now I feel nervous.

The first day actually went really well. That class was a good one to start with because she didn't have me hold many poses for too long. I had a little incident with my period, but not a single person noticed, and the girls in class were sympathetic and completely helpful.

Time went on and, well, things just fell into a sort of normalcy.

While my current teacher tells me I take great poses naturally (models switch classes every few weeks to give students a variety of forms to draw), I felt like an idiot during most of my early attempts. Luckily, however, that first class was a Life 1 class, and so most of the poses were short and simple, sometimes even as short as 3 to 5 minutes. It helped me get used to what the students needed and the teachers wanted.

Arms and legs out, bent, or turned in different ways to create a shape, back bent, slouched, twisted, or otherwise off-kilter to create a spinal curve, and (if standing) a tilt to the hips to bring out the center of balance, add more shape to the spine, and make the body a bit more "flowy".

It wasn't until later that I started having to hold poses for longer. In my current class I take a single pose for the entire class, taking a break every 15 to 20 minutes.

I must say that over time I've gotten a whole lot more comfortable with everything. Sure, there are mornings when I feel like I'd rather get the flu than go into class, but that's the way it is with any job at some point or other.

As I said, taking off the robe is always the worst part. Those few seconds of slipping it off can feel like eternity, even when you've been with the same class for weeks. It's just nerve wracking to be exposing yourself like that. But really, once it's off, the world is a different place. You sit back, relax, and chill out.
In a way, you can even enjoy the fact that you're sitting there completely naked without these people judging you. And believe me, they're probably not judging you at all, they really do get fucking focused.

I've actually gotten kind of fond of doing this, and wish I could make it a full time job and quite my real job. Right now I can only do one class at a time (hell, they probably only have enough Life Drawing classes for me to do one at a time), but if I could do more at once, I'd never ever have money problems.

I have this sickeningly sweet, uber-christian girl at work who, when I mentioned my side job, said she didn't understand why artists had to learn to draw naked people in the first place. Perhaps its my fairly liberal and very artistic upbringing, but I thought this was a ridiculous and sad question. How could you ever expect to really be able to draw a human body (clothed or unclothed) without ever seeing what the actual form was. There's so much to see and learn. It'd be like... trying to draw a cube without putting the lines around the edge to show what it actually is. It's just an outline of something obscure and unrealistic.
My friend Sammie, who I've recently (actually, it was over a month ago) commissioned to make my new Sin Secret logo, was always very timid about nudity, and -while she's a great artist- always said she didn't need to take live model classes. But then she took one, and fuck have I been able to tell the difference. Her drawings are so much better. The form is so much more proportional, accurate, and beautiful. Even clothed characters in her sketches look so much better because she has the basic knowledge of how the form itself is constructed.


Below I've listed the bad things about it, but also the good things.

The Awkwardnesses:
  • People joking about you being naked. (this doesn't happen very often, actually. I joke about it more than anyone else)
  • People touching you to put down tape (to mark your position. Not that bad, really, unless they're doing your thighs or back/stomach, or your standing and they have to end up right under your crotch...>.<)
  • Walking by really cute guys in the hall way (or worse, people you know) while in your teeny tiny robe
  • Anything involving bodily fluids (sweating a lot, feeling like you're getting ...wet, etc.) Having your period is an odd situation. Apparently some girls choose to wear bathing suits, but I either don't come in (the cramps take care of that problem) or I use a tampon and tuck it in nicely. That, however, is also an awkward factor. I spent a lot of my first class worrying about whether or not anyone could see it. >.<
  • Once again, bodily fluids. There's nothing worse than feel like your vagina's leaking when your sitting naked on a desk with people all around you so you can't check. Especially when you're wondering when your period is supposed to start. (This must go double for guys if there's a pretty girl in the room and you're not focusing really really hard. ....eeeeww...)
  • Hickeys, body acne, scratch marks, and ...well... whip welts. I love feeling the sensitive areas on my back, neck, etc. after a good nights play (although it's more often scratches and welts, I don't really do hickeys, and acne's not a big issue for me), and I don't mind showing off my "battle scars" when they're accidentally exposed, but when I pull off my robe and I've got lines down my back and hickeys all over my boobs, I get a bit nervous in front of everyone.
  • I don't do this, but apparently there are male models that will actually hit on female students while they're sitting there naked. I may make friends with the students in my classes, but that just seems...creepy, not to mention tacky and sleazy.
  • Teachers forgetting about your time. My current teacher has me time myself, but in that first class, the teacher forgot about my timing, and I wasn't facing a clock, so I had no idea what time it was. It was a standing pose and by the time I got the courage to ask if I could go ahead and break, it had be almost 45 minutes and I pretty much collapsed onto the floor, legs numb, hips tingling. Don't be afraid to ask for your break. Ever.

The 5 Worst Things about Modeling:
  1. Taking off your robe. It's terrifying having to take of your robe the first few times in front of brand new, strange- sometimes old or creepy- people. Taking off the robe is really the worst part. Once it's off, all is cool.
  2. The bad poses. Not only am I talking about the poses that hurt and make you twitch, shift, and move all the time while your legs, arms, and ass fall asleep, but also the poses that make you (me) look like total shit. Also, some poses are really hard for the students to draw, and then everything comes out looking bad and you feel like it's your fault.
  3. The occasional awkwardnesses. See list above.
  4. The fact that I only get one class at a time. If I could do two or even three classes a month, instead of just one class twice a week, I could quit my actual job and still pay all my bills, just for sitting naked for a few hours a day.
  5. The cramps! Oh my god when you're doing a single pose, your body starts to hurt so much by your second or third break. Your arms start to tingle and fall asleep, your neck stiffens up, your shoulders too, your legs start to feel heavy, numb, or hurt like fuck, and even your ass and genitals fall asleep all the damn time. Sometimes all you want is to collapse completely and just curl up into a little ball.
The 5 Best Things about Modeling:
  1. The simplicity. I love that I'm...not really working. Sure it can be painful to pose for so long, but the way I see it, I'm building muscle mass through a sort of resistance training. And if I were in shape it wouldn't be nearly as bad, so it gives me a reason to take up Yoga.
  2. The reliability. I get paid even if the teacher spends half the class lecturing and I barely pose. That's pretty damn cool.
  3. Did I mention I get paid $12/hr? The fact that I make more in three hours there than I do in a full shift at work...that rocks.
  4. The ego trip. There's always those days when you spend the entire three hours in a horribly unflattering pose that makes you look lumpy, slouched, and pissed off, but every now and then there are those days when you look oh-so sexy, slim, and adorable. Talk about walking out on Sexy Little Cloud 9. It's also very freeing, and even makes you feel better and more confident about your body no matter what you look like.
  5. The pictures. Like above, many pictures aren't all that great, but when you get someone with a picture that makes you sing with arrogant glee, it's not taboo to ask for it. You might have to wait for the end of the semester, but more often than not they're more than happy to give it to you when they can. Come December, my apartment is going to be filled with framed drawings of naked little me. it a gateway job? Will I soon be off to nude photo shoots for porn sites, stripping at bars and, eventually, selling myself on the streets? My mother certainly seemed to think so. She tried to pay me NOT to do it.

But....*shrug* I've certainly thought about it, being as much more comfortable with my body as I've become. But still there is that very basic difference. These sessions are not, in the least, about sex. Any of those jobs would be. I'm comfortable with this, but I probably wouldn't be with any sex-based job. So no, I don't think so.

But overall, I like the job. In fact, I could almost say I love it. If I had more hours I could pay my whole rent just for sitting in one spot for 3-6 hours a couple of times a week. Until I can, however, this serves as a great side job, and I definitely plan on keeping it up until they kick me out ^-^

PS: None of the pictures posted here are of me. I have requested some of the sketches students have done, but I haven't gotten any yet because they need them for portfolios. Once I have some, I'll try to put one or two up. But, fyi, none of these are them. ^-^

Have fun and play safe!

Adam & Eve's Ava Rose

Sunday, November 23, 2008

A Party (Pt 2) :: By Kay

At a random break, she took my purse from me, dropping it to the floor, informing me that I was not leaving, before she kissed me again.

Over and over, biting, clawing, kissing, her teeth randomly tugging at my lower lip. My neck throbbed with each of her bites, her lips always finding the same spot on my skin, I knew I’d have a hickey and I really didn’t care.

I would like to take the time to point out that we never touched each other in blatantly sexual zones, except the couple of times clutching each other’s asses, drawing our bodies closer together. And still, I found myself moaning, panting, whimpering into her mouth.

It was around this time, after we’d already spent forever entwined in each other, that they declared it was time for the birthday girl to get her birthday whippings. Twenty-six for her age, to be delivered by the people of the party, the twenty-seventh by the master himself for growth.

The girl and I were separated at this point, finding room to stand near the table where the birthday girl was strapped. I was rather disappointed, but I preferred not to look desperate and reserved myself to stand beside the stairs near a guy who began to eye me rather openly. He ended up standing behind me and, having been a voyeur to the show upstairs and possibly a participant I never saw, began to dig his nails into my back, clawing me.

My Master tried to pass the whip around, but people were wary to take it. Some people finally took turns and by about number 16, I believe, I took mine (only with the urging of the guy now rather intent upon me) and I laid one across her thigh, the thudding sound hitting my ears. I wasn’t sure how to feel about it as she shrieked on the table, but others soon took my place and I moved back to stand by the stairs.

A different guy, the one who had mixed my drinks, came over and placed ice cubes in my hand, telling me I should make a new friend. I gazed at him for a moment as he walked back across the room, unsure exactly what I was supposed to do and I let the ice melt for a long moment before I finally turned to the guy beside me, the one that had taken an interest in me, and ran them over his neck, to which he responded by clutching my back tightly, digging his nails in.

Drink Guy came back over and continued to stock me up with ice and at some point, I called The Girl back over and ran the ice over her neck as well, watching happily as her eyes fluttered shut. Her Boy walked by and I asked him if he would like some ice and I ran the remainder over his neck, trailing my cold fingers over his skin after it melted, playing with his skin momentarily before I was snatched back by Drink Guy and the other guy again.

By this time, they had found one of those tubey popsicles…it was pressed against my skin and they played with temperature for a short amount of time. Drink Guy pressed it against a place on my back and when he removed it, the two of them instantly placed their lips there, biting down, the warmth combining with the actual bite to make it seem that much worse than it was. I must say it was one of the craziest things I’ve ever felt and their lips felt so…warm…

Another guy came into the party a little while later and they invited him to bite me…apparently everyone was allowed to take a turn if they so chose, and at this point I was really beyond caring anyway. This guy was a gentler biter, nibbling more so, but still making sure to clamp hard enough to elicit and gasp and make it feel oh so good.

If I counted correctly, five people bit me on Saturday night, although I do not remember correctly. I had definitely slipped into a certain manner of subspace by this point and my time sequence and relative awareness of events was long gone, although never to the point where I was unsafe, of that I am definitely certain. I was fully aware that I could have said no, I just found that I didn’t want to. I felt so…sexy…for the first time in a long time, and really the sexiest I had ever actually felt.

My roommate and I went home a bit later and she counted my hickeys/bite marks. There were nine. Nine markings scattered over my neck and back. And The Girl was the only one that had touched a particular spot on my neck, so I know exactly which one is hers. Yes, know, because it is still there and my neck is still sore where she bit, a long, narrow bruise running about half the length of the left side of my neck.

And my lip is still a little swollen.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Weekly Surveys Anyone?

So, I'm hoping in the near future to have a series of articles interviewing sex workers. Not necessarily just prostitutes, but everyone and anyone who works in some area of sexual industries.
(While I'm on the subject, if you just happen to work in some sexual area - from street walking, professional submissive, to working in a porn shop, I'm open for everyone- please feel free to email me to be included in the series! I'd love to talk to you ^-^

But, my main problem is that I'm really bad at interviewing. You wouldn't think so, after a year and a half of writing news. But really, I am.

So as practice, and for a bit of fun, I've decided that every week, perhaps Monday to follow the weekend Submission post, or Friday to give you the weekend to remember, I will post a short short themed sex survey for you to fill out!
The surveys will be short questionnaires with 3-6 questions about a certain sexual theme.

Just fill it out in a comment and post it to the entry, or email it to me, or even post it on your own blog, forum, or website somewhere! (Just link back to me if you do, por favor).

I love hearing from readers, whether your just stopping by from a link, check by every week, or visit every day! It'll only take a minute so get to it!

So, to get you started, here's a sort of preview survey to get you ready!

What would you like to be called?
What is your gender?
What sex are you attracted to?
When did you lose your virginity?

I'll give you my answers if you'll send me yours!!!
~ I'm Sin!
~ Female
~ Anything sexy :)
~ Around 15 :(

See? Simple, quick, easy! And sometimes it might even be fun!

Until next time,
Have fun and play safe!

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Monday, November 17, 2008

Strip Baby Strip

So, the Twins (Kee and Neesh) convinced me to go out last Sunday night.
A somewhat new club in town - Rain- has weekend events with male exotic dancers. Last night was Ladies Appreciation Night.
After a bit of convincing, and W calling to let me know he'd be closing at work, I decided to go see me some strippers.

We arrived at the place a bit before nine, when it was supposed to start. There was no line, and the little bunches of cars in the lot all had people sitting inside them, waiting for some sign that it was time to get started. The nervous pussies we are, we sat in our car until a line of a few people had started, but still ended up waiting outside for a good 20 minutes. Even once inside and eventually seated, the show didn't start until almost 11.
(I realized at some point when inside that I'd been there before- at the time it was called The Flying Anvil, and I was there to see Of Montreal)

When they finally started, we were all bored out of our minds, and I was way past wondering whether it was worth the $20 or not (which I ended up not having to pay anyway, thank god).

The announcer, a tall semi-dark, semi-cute guy named Sixxx Nine, was fun and worth listening to, and introduced the dancers before getting the show started, finally.

Now, on a side note, at first, all the picture's Iput up here are with white or lightly mixed race men.
The dancers that night were all black. But do you have any idea how hard it is to find a picture online of a black male stripper? I mean, outside of porn stars? Shit, I couldn't find a damn thing. For some reason, when I searched "black male exotic dancer" I found a whole lot more than with "black male stripper". Hm....

The first dancer was an extremely large man who wasn't particularly sexy (for fairly obvious reasons) but was fun to watch, and Kee dropped him one of my singles.

The next, was one of my favorites. I don't entirely remember his name, but I think they called him Allure, and alluring he was.
He came out in a black outfit something like a cowboy outfit torn to straps, with chains around his neck, leather thongs of fabric around his arms and legs, and, of course, a tasseled pouch holding in his... jewels.
This guy was fine.
Smooth skin and smooth moves, he slinked his way through the small crowd, and I adored it. I had to give him money.

I think it's important to mention how extraordinary it was to give out my first dollar (well, second, technically Kee gave my first). He was strutting past, slow and sexy, and slowed down near our table. I knew exactly where I wanted to put my sad, lonely dollar. Not his chest or his g-string, but one of those sexy straps around his thighs.
So I reached out my hand, sliding my fingers slowly and intentionally down the slick skin of his thigh, and slid the folded bill between this leather strip and that soft, muscular leg.
It was wonderful.
I haven't managed to get to a regular strip club yet, but I down plopping a single in the string of a hot female stripper doesn't compare to the sensuality of my first time giving a male one money.
It was hot.

After that the dances went up and down. I can honestly say that I felt they were all way too long. The dancers didn't dance to just one song, they danced to a couple mixes of songs. While I appreciated the fact that there was a limited number of dancers, they could have at least done them bit by bit, instead of all at once.

Also, the costumes, while some were really neat and hot, seemed lacking in sexuality. While some did wear full outfits that they actually stripped out of, many just came out in their g-stringed pouch and straps.

But, apart from the massive waiting time, the fact that it went on for-fucking-ever, and the little gender/race problem I have (explained lower down, if you're interested), I did have a really good time.

A few decent dancers, a couple "bleh" ones, five bucks, four or five soft kisses on my neck, cheek, and head by randomly passing and groping dancers, not to mention several sexy lap dances later, the twins and I were exhausted and ready to get the hell home.

I did love the mini private dances though. They weren't overtly vulgar or dirty (except that one guy that slapped my thigh a couple times with his ridiculously long pouched penis, asking "Have you been a bad girl?", to which I really had no idea what to say), and were actually really sensual.
One of the first ones to touch us came up behind the three of us, rubbing and grinding against our backs, one at a time, while sliding his hands up our backs.

My favorite, if I remember right, started behind me and worked his way forward. Grinding against my back before coming around to my front, pulling my hips forward, his hands around my waist, and grinding against my crotch. It wasn't too bad, and I couldn't help but pulse a little in time, my hands awkwardly behind my back so I wouldn't touch him. He whispered in my ear, something about me being so sexy (which, if it had any merit, was probably because my blouse was buttoned really low), and I believe he kissed my neck softly.

The best part was his hands sliding up and down my legs and stomach, and finally groping my boob, soft and gentle, but firm. I practically cried out. I was glad to slide a dollar where ever I could.

I think I was completely unprepared for the eroticism I felt. Being with W for so long, and not having any real sort of contact with any other man, I was overwhelmed by the sensuality and desire I felt through most of the night.

Yes, I was turned on. Yes, I enjoyed it. Yes, W was a bit weird about it when I got home, but the way I explained it, me being turned on happens rarely enough as it is. If I can get turned on at all, I should be able to appreciate and enjoy it. I mean, shit, he watches porn, and that turns him on, but I don't mind.
The way I see it, desire is amazing, and any time we can feel it, as long as our actions are still ... pur? loyal?, we should be able to acknowledge each others desires and enjoy them when and where we can get them. No cheating required (or allowed).

Here's a bit of Race/Gender theory, maybe a bit boring, your welcome to skim or skip:
I've never been to an everyday male strip club, so I don't have anything to compare this group to, but I definitely saw a lack of acceptance for the role of a stripper. That probably sounds a bit chauvinistic for a feminist sex writer, but let me explain.

I do think that the role of a stripper is objectifying, I do. But in the context of the job, I don't see that as a problem.
The job of a stripper is to become an object of desire. This should go for male and female strippers. Your job isn't to do things, it is to make the audience feel like they can do things to you. While you obviously play the dominant role (i.e. the audience isn't allowed to touch you), you are meant to create the illusion of the bottom. Something the audience can use.
This group fulfilled that now and again, but not nearly as well or often as they should've. It far far more often that the dancers would take a girl onstage and get them (more or less push them) to do things like sucking a dildo against his crotch (making it look, to the audience, like she was actually licking his penis), or sucking a banana, and even pulling them up by their hair or thrusting against them hard enough to make their bodies bounce.
The flips and dives they did with the girls were amazing, but these much more vulgar acts would have been entertaining if they'd just been part of a concensual show, but just weren't sexy for women. At least not for me.
They were much more like what a female stripper would do for a guy she pulled on stage; licking a banana near his crotch or pretending to blow him.
To me, a stripper making an audience member to do something to him hisn't sexy, its switching the roles and objectifying the girl he's brought up, switching the sexual power play, and making the whole idea... moot and unsexy.

I could write pages and pages about the gender and race implications that were involved in all of that, but since it'd be no fun, I think I'll save it for my WGS thesis ^-^'

So, that was my first experience with a strip show; Ladies Night at a club with male exotic dancers. Fun, a bit slow, but overall interesting and worth...the freeness. I would've been pissed if I had to wait that long for a $20 show.

But really, thank you to Kee and Neesh for dragging me along, and yes, maybe I will go back with you some time ^-^

Until next time,
Have fun and play safe!

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Sunday, November 16, 2008

A Party (Pt 1) :: By Kay

Yet another uber long post by Kay. It's much more positive than the last, and a bit more fun too ^-^ Will have the second part up next week. Kay writes too damned much.

"Oh Look! Balloons! It Really Is A Party"
My first large BDSM gathering...
By Kay

Saturday was a birthday party for a fellow submissive, the huggy, happy one I mentioned in the prior post. She studies under a different Master, but she has regular playdates with my Master and so he hosted her birthday. And of course that meant the basement was used.

My roommate and I got there probably about an hour into it or so and people still had not really made it into the basement, which, to be perfectly honest, was fine by me.

There was a rather awkward moment when I came across two old friends of mine from a couple years back that I hadn’t spoken to in a while. It turned out they were there merely because they were close friends of hers in the geek community, but were not into the BDSM scene, which is fine and dandy by me, for if they had stuck around for later activities I do believe I would not have had as much fun. As it was, it was slightly awkward with them there anyways while I discussed things with my Master that I would really have preferred they did not hear, but of which I was not going to deter myself from speaking.

A girl that I had a slight crush on showed up a little while later, but she had a boy with her that she was treating as a boyfriend (even now, I have no idea what their relationship is). I found myself rather disappointed as I had my heart set on flirting with her. There were so many couples present that I began to find myself overwhelmed and I set out to get plastered. So I mentioned to a friend (and a few other people that were around and listening) that I would like to drink, but that I did not wish to take any of the hard stuff unmixed. And so a rather nice guy mixed me up a really great drink which I found myself rather content with for the time being.

I chatted with a few more people and when I finished the drink, I made a point to declare that I could still see properly and so they guy inquired as to whether or not I was referring to my empty glass. He refilled it, this time making the alcohol content rather higher in proportion to the mix and I can safely say that after that one I could not see properly at all. Yes, I am a lightweight. Make fun all you want, but it is my theory that it is a rather good thing because it takes less money to get me drunk and on a college budget, that’s great. Besides, if I pace myself, I find I can hold alcohol rather nicely…it’s when I chug that I have issues.

And so I was happily drunk, flirting with anyone and everyone.

And then came the point in time when I decided I wanted to snuggle with a girl so I found my roommate’s sister and was prepared to hug her, but against my wishes, my Master found the girl I was flirting with and brought her to me. He has issues with boundaries. I pulled him aside and asked what he said to her and he declared that he told her I wished to “sex her.” I wanted to hit him.

But regardless, she wrapped her arms around me and kissed me with so much force and thus began the most insane, most erotic night.

People don’t really believe me, but I sobered up rather quickly and soon our hands were all over each other, pulling our bodies closer together. Mind you, there was still a room full of people but no one cared and that kind of behavior is rather expected at these parties. At least at my Master’s house. People are kinky. It’s great.

So we stood kissing for a bit, some people watching us. I was totally not caring at this point because my god she was a good kisser and her lips knew just what I wanted. Limited tongue, and surprisingly, close-mouthed. It was intense. She kissed me with so much force some of the time that she bent me back in the process, keeping our lips together.

If we ever really pulled apart for a certain extended time, my Master would come over and do something that forced our bodies, our lips back together again. At one point dug his nails into our backs, causing us to arch into each other.

At some point, the topic of biting came up and she asked if I liked it. I, of course, said yes and she bit down on my neck, pulling at the skin, sucking on it, teasing it between her teeth. I whimpered softly, no longer caring who heard. I’ve only ever been nibbled before. This was a whole new thing, fulfilling so many of my vampire fantasies in one go.

She pulled back momentarily, rather proud of herself I think and each time she went back to bite, she made sure to focus on the same spot, increasing the intensity of each bite and the rush it sent through me. At some point, the boy came over and she asked him if he wished to have a side of my neck, which he readily accepted and the two bit down on my neck at the same time. His bite was gentler than hers. I believe he was probably not sure about biting me hard since he barely knew me. But either way, it felt harder when it was coupled with hers.

And so that is how the boy joined in the fun and he played with each of us in turn. At one point, he made out with her and I proceeded to nibble on her neck, flicking my tongue over her skin, acting out things I’d never dreamed I’d actually be able to do.

At some point, we made our way to the couch and sat for a bit, my leg over her lap. She caressed it gently and we sat and socialized for a while with other people who were rather friendlier towards us after our little show.

But it wasn’t long before the socializing idea rather died and she motioned for me to straddle her and we again made out, our bodies grinding together. The boy spoke up from beside us at some break in the making out and said that we were hot. I found that rather amusing.

I find it so easy to lose track of the sequence of events at this place and at some point my roommate decided we should go. So I rose to go but I only made it so far as to get my purse before the girl was giving me a kiss goodbye and we were making out again, better, more intense than before. Her hands were clawing at my back and at some point, the boy’s were too. And I do believe a couple other people may have joined. I didn’t know whose hands were on my back and I didn’t care. The only pair I cared about was hers and they were clutching me tighter, digging into my skin.

to be continued...

Friday, November 14, 2008

What Your Heart Tells You to Do?

Because this needs to be seen.

Thank you to Sugarbutch for posting it, and giving me the chance to see such a passionate, wonderful speech.

All you need is love.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

A New (mini) Toy Review!

I realized the other day that I haven't put up a toy review in a really friggin long time.
Now, if you've noticed, I have still been doing them. I mean, I'm up to double digits on EF as far as reviews go, but I haven't been posting them here. (I also noticed, fyi, that I haven't done a position of the week in months, so I'm hoping to do another of those soon, so stay tuned.)

So, I decided to go ahead and put up a little mini review for my most recent toy.

EVOLved's Diamond Princess

This is a very basic, fairly average toy by the company EVOLved (which I've never heard of before, but I like it's name).

The presentation is nice, pretty hard-rock-ish with a black, red, and silver tin case and the toy nestled in black and red foam.
The toy itself is black with little crystal rhinestones circling the bottom.

Buzz-wise, the thing doesn't get all that wonderful. It'd be good for someone who's not used to vibrators, or someone with a very sensitive clit.
It is, by the way mostly for clitoral situation. Insertion is okay, but its really slim, so unless your nice and sensitive, it might not do too much for you.
Anally, of course, it's a no-no. It doesn't have any sort of piece on the end to keep it from sliding in and staying there. Not a good idea.

The main idea of the review is that the toy is cute, pretty, and okay, but not anything all that great. It's not that strong, and doesn't have anything particularly unique that sets it apart from the many other mediocre vibrators.

So; "nice, but nothing special".

You can read my full review here: Diamond Princess - Traditional vibrators | Review by Sin Secret

Until next time!
Have fun and play safe!
<3 Sin

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Sunday, November 9, 2008

Mindless Rambling and Email :: By Kay

I think it's very important to see how Kay's attitudes towards her sessions and master have changed over the past few entries, and in upcoming ones too. I think it says a lot about the way people look at BDSM and, in a way, idealize it without really realizing what it means for different people and whether or not its actually something you want or just a passing (or even shock-value) interest you have. Not that I've mentioned that to Kay, but I don't think she even reads my site any more >.<

Another Email from the Master and some mindless ramblings...

By Kay
I have five relatively easy tasks for you.
1. Find one girl that you find attractive. Think about the things that makes you most attracted to her.
2. Think about how you would describe "submissiveness" or "submission" to someone who has no knowledge of it. I would recommend writing it down because I am going to ask you how you see submission.
3. I want you to think about the thing that makes you the most happy about being a submissive. What need does it fill? How does it fill that need? How does it make you feel?
4. Read the explanation of goals here: and think of a goal for yourself.
5. Think up your name. If you can't think of one, I will get Jewels to give you one. She's inventive like that. If you would like more input on your name, I would recommend talking with her first, so that the two of you can come up with one together that you both like.
I will see you at noon on Sunday. I have a meeting at 3pm, so if you want a longer session, we could postpone until 4pm and then go late.
Thank you,


We WERE supposed to have a session last Saturday, but I started my period...and since he's a fan of nudity, well, you know.

Is it just me or does the whole nudity part make you question his motives? I mean we have set down before that we don't plan to have sex....ever...I just don't understand the importance of complete nudity. Granted, I have found myself more comfortable with my own body since we began this, but at the same time, there were other ways for me to go about gaining that confidence...if I felt like it. I don't know...

I'm ashamed of my collar, the one I bought to wear everywhere. I wore it twice. And then after a while I just began to feel like a dog and it was degrading. If I find someone that actually wants to collar me, then I might wear it, but as of right now, I just feel weird wearing it. Or looking at it.

And as for the email above, the fact that he makes me think SO MUCH about FEELINGS makes me feel like I'm in a regular therapy session. I already have a therapist. I don't need another one. A therapist, I might add, that I haven't even figured out how to tell about all this stuff. If the session posts weren't so graphic, I believe I would just bring them in to her. But I think I would end up forcing my therapist to get a therapist herself. Ah well...

The joys of being a person that is beyond messed up...

See what I mean? Anyway, check out Kay's blog at A Life Beneath, and stop by next Sunday to see if she shapes up, or continues her negative emotions..
Have fun and play safe!

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Thursday, November 6, 2008

My First Movie Review: "Zack and Miri"

For my very first movie review, I'm very glad to have the new Kevin Smith movie; Zack and Miri Make a Porno.

W. introduced me to Kevin Smith not long after we started dating. For those who don't recognize the name, Smith is the writer/creator of the infamous movies Clerks, Clerks II, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, and Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, as well as the wonderful movies Dogma and Jersey Girl (can you tell they're my favorites?). We definitely love Kevin Smith, and Zack and Miri didn't hamper that adoration.

First, lets talk about who's in it.
The main stars are Seth Rogan (made famous by Superbad, Knocked-Up, and The 40-yr-old Virgin) and Elizabeth Banks (previously in The 40-yr-Virgin, Spider-man, and the upcoming movie Role Models). I'm not that big on Rogan, but I do think Banks is pretty hot, and it's not the first time we've seen her in his movies.
With them (the porno cast) was Jason Mewes (previously the infamous Jay of Jay and Silent Bob), Jeff Anderson (from the Clerks movies), and Craig Robinson (from Daddy's Little Girls, Pineapple Express, and a small part in Knocked Up) among some other sexy bodies.

Also popping up in the film is Justin Long, and a delightfully surprising Brandon Routh (Clark Kent from Superman Returns).

I was, however, dissapointed that Smith himself didn't show up at any point for a cameo, but I didn't really expect it anyway.

The basic premise is that Zack and Miri - best friends since childhood- are living together and desperate for money. While escaping their heatless apartment at a local bar, Zack comes up with the idea to create a porno to make some money. After some debating and deciding, they set out to find a cast and crew, and try to make a porno.
They quickly come into trouble with money, locations, and who-does-what-when. Not to mention the obvious and unavoidable romantic troubles between Zack and Miri.

When it came to sex, this movie was chock full of it. Kevin Smith movies have always been steeped in sexual innuendos and jokes, but I was fairly surprised (although I shouldn't have been) at the amount of blatant sex. At the first shot of nudity (a full female frontal), I was shocked and delighted, probably thinking something along the lines of "Yay, there are boobs in the movie!!"
And boobs there were.

I'm ecstatic that there was no attempt to lower the rating of this movie to reach a bigger audience, or cut down on the nudity and blatant sex. I mean, you can't make a movie about making a porno without actually showing the making of the porno. So hurray for you, Kevin Smith, for not pussy-ing out on the much-needed nudity.

W and I agree that there were a lot of places where you could see Seth Rogen's influence on the film. I'm not too fond of him myself (I like Knocked-Up, but can't get into his others), but I think the movie came out great.

I can't think of any real problems with it right off the bat. It uses a lot of the type of movie style Kevin Smith is famous for (specifically, a movie that revolves around people and conversations), and I really like that.

Overall I think they did great job with the storyline. It starts simply, has a single main story, and even uses some autobiographical events based on Smith's work in the movie biz. I was slightly disappointed with the ending, and if you see it you'll probably see why (if not, you're welcome to ask, but I write no spoilers >.<), but I did enjoy it anyway.

It was a really fun movie and I definitely recommend it.

(Speaking of Porn, why not stop by and get some? ^-^)

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

"I Don't Know If I Hate Him Enough to Wake Up This Early"

So here I am, November 4th, at 8:30 in the morning, ready to go vote. UUUUGGGHHH. I'm totally not happy about it.
Idiot me worked through most of the Early Voting sessions, so I have to wake up early, wait in line, and then march my ass to class, then to work. I hate full days >.< I've already made my stance on the election clear, but I won't go into that again. Isn't it weird how so many people (more-so companies) are being so careful about this election? Everyone's afraid they'll get in trouble for making it look like they promote one candidate or another. Anyway. I've already stated my views so I won't do it again here. Just remember, if I can wait two hours in line (which I'll probably end up doing) to vote for who's gonna fuck up our country next, so can you. So get your ass out there and vote for somebody, anybody!

Happy voting


Edit:: Actually, I was in and out of voting within 15 minutes. And on the way home, I was serenaded by a guy with a guitar playing "Something" by the Beatles.
I had a good morning ^-^

Sunday, November 2, 2008

My Into to Double Submission :: By Kay

Finally! A Kay piece! It doesn't look like these will be continuing for too much longer, so enjoy while you can!

My Double Sub
By Kay

Wednesday’s session was extremely out of the ordinary.

I’d asked him before about double submissive scenes, expressing a great interest in doing some if he would allow it. He told me I needed to learn the basics first, but once I had a grasp on those, he would definitely bring someone in.

He called me up around ten and asked if I still wished to play. He informed me that there was currently a group gathered at his house, but if I wished to play I could still head over. So my roommate and I went down there and there was indeed a rather large group gathered. I met another one of his submissives, a really sweet girl full of lots of energy and hugs.

I got hugs from a few more people, people I’d met the night I had my first session but hadn’t seen since. They’re amazing people really. Once you’re in, you’re in for life. Again though, this is just the people I’ve met, most of whom are college students just trying to find a place in the world.

We chatted casually for a bit before deciding to head to the dungeon, at which point he informed me that another girl there wished to nibble on a girl and he inquired as to whether or not I was up for that. You can bet your ass I was.

Until we got down to the dungeon.

She was quick to enter subspace so he sat her on a bench at the back while he worked me towards it.

Again I was finding it immensely difficult. He had me down in the first/submissive position and just as I was about to slip into subspace, just as he was calming me, guess what he says? “Undress.”

You know that part where you’re not supposed to look at your Master? That went out the window in about two seconds. My head snapped up so fast and I just stared at him, eyes wide, mouth open. I’m sure I looked like a deer in the headlights.

This got me a stern “Why are you looking at me?”

I believe at this point all I managed to do was blink.

“You’re still looking at me.”

I blinked again before I finally shot up from the floor, grabbing his arm, I said something along the lines of “Um, can we talk?” And I led him to the far end of the dungeon and I believe I just blinked at him some more.

He gazed into my eyes and somehow he calmed me down, telling me that everything would be okay. I think I was still so close to the edge of subspace that he was able to easily get me into it and he finally told me that he would have her undress with me so I wasn’t doing it alone. For some odd reason, I was okay with that.

So needless to say, we undressed, handing our clothes to our Master. He realized that I was still not in subspace and he thus set about helping me to enter it. He allowed me to pick any manner of flogger/whip that I wished to play with and he had me bend over the table, setting fifteen strokes on my back, rather gentler than he normally would, as I was not in subspace and it would have hurt immensely if he’d used his usual force.

I finally managed to slip into subspace and the two of us were then informed that we would be suspended together. WOW. Just WOW.

He told us, then, that we were allowed to make-out, but only if he was whipping one of us. If he stopped, we had to stop, otherwise we would be punished.

He walked around us, swishing the whip menacingly before he laid it on us. A few strokes on one, a few strokes on the other. Man, she’s a really good kisser.

Our bodies pressed harder together as we arched into each other, away from the pain. The more intense the pain, the more our bodies pressed together and the harder it was to make-out.

At some point, he told us that we were now allowed to make out whenever we wished so it pretty much became make-out time when we weren’t whipped because we were panting too heavily whenever the whip fell on us to really do much of anything.

On one of his rounds around our bodies, I accidentally looked at him. Normally, I am very good about not looking at him, but for some odd reason it was hard this time. I think it may have had something to do with the fact that I had boobs pressed in my face and I wasn’t too keen on staring am them the whole time. So I looked to the side just as he happened to walk by. I didn’t even mean to look at him. I didn’t even want to. I just didn’t want to look at boobs.

Regardless, he stepped behind me, pulling my hair aside, murmuring in my ear. He told me that while he could not punish me for looking at him earlier because we had not discussed some things, I’d looked at him just now.

And he stated that he would give me twenty-five flogs for it. He started with nine, but my hands were beginning to feel numb so I cried out and told him as much. He adjusted them, adding a length of chain to the hook so I had more to hold on to and a little bit more leeway.

He then began his rounds around us again, stating that in his dungeon, we were to share punishments equally, so for looking at him, my sister (When speaking to one of us, he referred to the other as our ‘sister submissive’ or ‘sister.’) would also receive her twenty-five. I immediately proclaimed that he should not punish her for what I did and that I would take her share. I couldn’t even begin to tell you why I blurted that, but I did. No joke. He asked, then, if it meant that I would take fifty. I told him yes, but then after a brief pause, I stated that I would take her punishment, but only if she wished it. He asked her if she would take her share and she said yes. So I was let off the hook. Thank God.

Well he seemed to forget (thought probably not on accident) that I had already received nine, and thus he started on me again. He did the same crisscross motion that he has done during previous lessons, meaning four times the impacts. He gave me ten strokes, then moved around and gave her ten. I don’t quite remember how he laid the rest of the strokes, but I do know that at some point, he was beside us, whipping us both at the same time.

When he finished that again, I realized my hands were once again going numb and instead of fixing it, he decided to end our suspension time. He unhooked my arms and I nearly felt like I was going to fall off the tire. I’m terrified of heights so even though it was only a foot off the ground, I started hyperventilating.

He grabbed me from behind and held me, telling me I was safe, that he wouldn’t let me fall. He told me to wrap my arms around my sister’s waist and then he proceeded to let go, at which point I freaked out again. He unhooked one of her arms so that she was able to hold me and she kissed my head and whispered that it was going to be okay.

He unhooked her other arm and she wrapped it around me, continuing to whisper as he unhooked our legs. He lifted me off of the tire and set me on the ground where I regained my balance and calmed.

I was surprised to find myself very…wet (for lack of a better, more pristine term) as I stood in the middle of the floor, waiting for instruction.

And this is where things got super fun. It was time for sensation play! My favorite!

I asked him how he wished me to lay on the table and he told me to choose. I said I wished to lay on my stomach as I rather like things being done to my back, at which point he informed me that if I laid on my back, he would allow my sister to play with my nipples. So I lay on my back.

He brought out the blindfold, the one that blocks out any manner of light and keeps your eyes shut. After it was secured, he then informed me that he was proud of me today and that he would now allow me to be collared. He also said that because he was so proud of me, I would be allowed to wear the collar whenever I entered his dungeon. I love that damn collar.

It’s like a regular dog collar, only heavier and when I’m in subspace, the clasp feels so cold against my skin. It’s amazing.

At this point he pulled out various implements, allowing my sister to use some as well. There were moments in time when I was unable to tell who was doing what. The only very obvious one was when he used the leather gloves, manhandling my body.

And he was definitely using the satin scarf because she would definitely not have wrapped it over my mouth the way he did. I don’t know why I find it so erotic to be unable to speak, to have my moans muffled.

At some point, he gave her permission to begin teasing my nipples and she leaned down, suckling on them gently, grazing her teeth over them.

He asked me if I liked watching a girl orgasm and I told him very truthfully that I didn’t know, as I had never seen it (I’ve only ever had one serious girlfriend and the sex was, well, bland.). He then asked if I wished to watch it and for reasons I don’t even know, I said “I guess.”

He left to set up the Sybian, the giant vibrator that I believe he said is somewhere around 18 horsepower. I know it was in the teens.

My sister was allowed to continue playing with me and let me tell you, she’s damn good at using some of those implements. I believe at this point, the only one she used was the tiny hammer with the five pins in the head.

And the most erotic part? It got to the point where my breaths became dependent on the hammer’s contact with my skin. I let out a quiet pant each time it fell, becoming still as soon as it lifted. And these were nothing more than quick taps each.

When he finished setting it up, he gave her instructions as to how she was to sit on it. As they weren’t directed at me, I was barely paying attention. What I do know is that he put her on the one that’s mean specifically for stimulating the clit.

I was to position myself on my knees behind her, doing what I could to help her orgasm as she rode the Sybian (It literally is riding. It’s a large hump on the ground that you straddle and then it vibrates with you on it. It’s really freaky.). Basically this consisted of sitting behind her, planting kisses on her back, my arms wrapped around her torso, my hands playing with her nipples.

I can safely tell you that I was out of subspace by this point and frankly I was feeling nothing whatsoever. I don’t think my Master realized I was no longer in subspace, but he should realize that any talk of orgasm or sexual activity immediately snaps me out of it. My mind has some sort of trigger words or something, little mental red flags that tell me I need to be on my guard, something highly impossible if still in subspace.

So the thought of being naked, pressed against her, no longer turned me on because in the real world (a.k.a. outside subspace) this girl just doesn’t turn me on. It’s nothing against her, it’s just a fact of life. And I’m actually almost positive I don’t turn her on either. Which begs the question why I agreed to this in the first place?

For some odd reason, I was compelled to allow this activity to continue. She was still in subspace and I mean I decided to just play along. It wouldn’t really have been fair to her to cut it short. Though I’m not so sure it was fair to continue in such a disinterested manner either.

So she rode it to orgasm (Although he would not allow her to orgasm until she asked him and if she merely said ‘please’ he promised that he would shut the machine off and not let her orgasm at all.). Then I was told to move around the front and the process was repeated.

The third time, he told me I was to determine when she was allowed to orgasm and she had to look me in the eyes while she did. Let me just say that it was VERY hard not to look at HIM at this point. I thought this was rather ridiculous, but I played along, although not for very long. I made her wait like a minute before I let her orgasm, stating merely “Cum for me” in a hushed voice as she rode it out.

And then I held her and kissed her when she finished. It just seemed appropriate.

Don't forget, for full, unedited posts, stop by Kay's blog; A Life Beneath. Until next time, have fun and play safe! <3


Saturday, November 1, 2008

Advice for the Pre-Orgasmic

Problems with orgasms is one of the most frequent sexual problems in women. I've been there (and am there), and know how much it sucks. So here's an advice piece I hope some of you can find some use and help in.

so, i have a girlfriend who is a virgin. and every time we are intimate, i always get her to the brink of orgasming, however, she doesnt know how to let go of her self. she says that she feels like she has to pee quite often, and she gets really wet down there, and she pants, moans etc...all the signs of her almost having an orgasm...but she doesnt know how to let go of her self.

we've been together for about 8 months now, and active for about 6 months now, and i've only been able to give her 3 orgasms, and once was while our session ended, she hit an orgasm while she was peeing...:S and the other time i was just kissing her, and not even near her a fluke on my end?

i'm guessing that she has to pee, or pretend she has to in order to orgasm, but i dont know. and shes a bit more clueless about her body than i am. she wouldnt dare masturbate to explore her self, so i dont know...

so my question is primarily for women, what do you(you as in you personally) have to do in order to climax? sure, clear your mind, relax, breath deep, enjoy the feeling...then what?

and she also complains about cramps afterwards, and according to my research, women getting cramps afterwards being intimate(and without an orgasm) is the female version of 'blue-ball'. and in the long run, can end up dangerous due to leading to cervical cancer and other weird things...

so, please? i really want my girlfriend to orgasm, but i dont know what to do...and sex isnt really an option for me.

Hi there.
I spent a long time not being able to orgasm, and I've worked really hard to get where I am now, and I still can't do it often. Definitely try what has been recommended. Communication and fantasies are very important to bring out a persons sexuality. But beyond that, here's what I'd recommend, as far as what I've learned.

First off, let her know it would be okay to pee. Not pleasant, of course, unless you're into that, but acceptable. Now, it might not actually be urine, because some women do actually ejaculate. I'm one of them, and it's only occasionally urine, but that does happen sometime.. I'm not going to tell you it's not pee, because you guys would know best, but be aware that it might not always be. But either way, make sure she knows it's okay to let it out. The sensation that comes with orgasming can make you feel like your going to piss all over the place, and it keeps you from letting your muscles release, which might be one of her problems. Just because she feels like she will doesn't mean she's going to, and vice-versa. Urine's sterile anyway, and it's not impossible to clean up, so if nothing else, lay down a towel or plastic mat/sheet, and tell her to go for it (as long as it's not your mouth down there ^^').

Second, have her look up Kegel stretches. It's a type of exercise for the muscles around the vagina. Doing them daily increases your vaginal strength and sometimes your ability to orgasm. Plus I've found, quite recently, that when I'm working towards an orgasm, a few well placed (or one continuous) Kegel squeeze can bring it all together and push me over the edge. So it might be worth her giving it a try. It just takes practice.

Third, how about trying some hardware?
I tend to recommend long term couples with orgasmic problems to look for a toy to help them get where they're going. Something small and gentle, and probably made for the clitoris, since a lot of first time orgasms come from there. Try shopping together at your local adult novelty store such as Adam & Eve, Priscillas, etc (if you're over 18 and can get in). Or check out online stores like Also, condom company Durex has come out with some simple (sometimes disposable) vibrators that you can occasionally get in the condom/"family planning" aisle of stores like Wal-Mart and drug stores.
Toys aren't a must, but a good, simple vibrator might help push things over the edge and out of the frustrated zone.

But you should also remember that it is (supposedly) rare for young females to really be able to orgasm before certain ages. I spent years trying to get myself to orgasm, and it took a long time to get vibrators to work (and be comfortable for me), and only recently have I managed to orgasm more easily (still only with a vibrator, and in the right position). But make sure she knows that there's more than likely nothing wrong with her, it just takes time, communication, and a bit of work and patience.

Another thing you can try, is some reading material. Have her check out books like The Elusive Orgasm, The Orgasm Bible (the "O Loop" detailed here worked especially well for me a couple times), the Good Orgasm Guide, or even How to Have an Orgasm . . . As Often As You Want, and see if it helps her out.

That's all for now, but no, as far as I know, female "blue balls" doesn't cause any type of cancer or future problems. If it did, I'd be pretty fucked. I used to cramp up all the time after foreplay, thanks to my own problems. I will look into it more though, and get back to you if i find anything saying otherwise.

Good luck and Play Safe!

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