3 Months and Quite A Few Orgasms Later...

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Yet More HNTness

I've never really understood the whole "innocent girl next door" fetish, not really.
But these socks, so smooth and high up...leaving that cool flesh between my short skirt and the colorful socks completely bare......
it does feel sexy.......


PS. I have a great story for you guys this weekend. Check back!

Lacey Half Naked Thursday

The lace feels scratchy but exotic against my skin. I follow the bumps and ridges up the curves of my stomach, roaming over the soft flesh of my breasts. My nails rake gently over my skin and a moan slips from my lips.

<3
~Sin

Get Burned with Jenna Jameson. Wait, No, Don't.

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(Late) Sunday Sex Position :: Running With Scissors

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Tune in, Turn off...

Okay, so! Since I got a pretty decent response about the podcast idea, PhoneGirl and I are planning a TalkShoe live conversation this Sunday. More than likely in the late afternoon/evening (US Eastern Time).

Not sure about the details yet but it will be a live audio show that you can tune into on this site or PhoneGirl's site (or the TalkShoe site), call into from your phone/computer (I believe), and I'll be on the IM services and my email if you'd like to send me a message or question (also, if you have a question you want us to answer during the show, email one of us at sinsekret@gmail.com or phonesexlife@gmail.com). It'll be a short, introductory show to say hello, bring up some basics, give some advice, and see how everybody feels about it.

I'll let you know more tomorrow, but just don't forget to stop by Sunday night to check it out! ^-^

I'm also really considering this whole erotica reading thing....At first it was just something in passing I threw into what a podcast could do, but now I'm really considering the possibilities. Don't you think it would be sexy to hear erotic fiction read to you? Maybe not, but I'm thinking I'd like to give it a try. If you'd like to submit some writing for me to read, or would like to be part of the reading, let me know!


Have fun, Play safe!
<3
Sin

Bye Bye Entrecard

No Top Droppers for this month, or any other month for that matter, because as it turns out Entrecard dropped me.

No idea why they suddenly decided that I was no longer "appropriate" for their "family friendly" site. I mean, I haven't posted any boobs lately, have I?

Either way, I am no longer able to access my account, so don't have my statistics or the nifty advertising opportunities.

Oh well, fuck you too Entrecard. Bite my sexy, inappropriate ass.

In other news, my last day at "the day job" is tomorrow, so starting Monday I'll have more time to do the psuedo-sexy stuff, with sexy things, that you love to hear about. At least, I hope you do.
Until around the 20th, I'll have no other job but this blog, so you'll probably be hearing from me a lot.


Hopeful pieces of interest this month include:

• The comeback of the Positions of the Week. (although it might be every other week...also maybe an adult product of the week, but that's less likely) Yay! That seemed to be something popular that just dissipated as I got lazy...
  
• More relationship advice, thanks to me attempting to jump-start a dating column for the paper.
• An orgasm experiment! I'm considering the idea of seeing how many orgasms I can have in one day (or several days), while still actually getting things done.
• The last few parts of the Something Sweet To Suck On experiment(hopefully), including garlic, sweet potato, chocolate, and cayenne pepper.
• My full analysis of the Orgasm Loop, a book about achieving orgasms during sex, which EF sent me to review this past month.
• A possible new article series about porn! Am currently looking for a porn rental site (if you know of any, drop me a line), for a new group of articles/reviews about porn- for women who don't like porn (and the men/women who love/fuck them).
• More erotica for your personal enjoyment, if I can cough it up.

February should hopefully see some valentines day posts. Including sexy date ideas, what to have for dinner, and what toys, books, and videos you should have for bedtime. Hopefully February will also see the beginning and end of the series of posts I've been wanting to do about people in the sex industry. It seems like an appropriate time.


Well, that's all for now, see you soon!

Have fun, Play safe.
~Sin

Simple and Clean - A Poem

Simple.

Like hearts joined by chains of creative romance.
Bound together with silken red ribbons.
Wrists together, pulled tight against the bed.
Back stretched, ass taut, legs spread; ready, willing.

Clean.
Like slowly dripping sweat, salty on your lips.
Tingling streaks of thin, red, stinging lines down my back.
Bodies pressed together, thrust painfully, beautifully deep.
Muscles clenching, releasing, falling

into ecstasy.

ps: I finally got an affiliate account w/ Babeland! Yay!
I <3 them, and I bet you will too ^-^

My Into to Double Submission :: By Kay

Finally! A Kay piece! It doesn't look like these will be continuing for too much longer, so enjoy while you can!

~Sin

My Double Sub
By Kay

Wednesday’s session was extremely out of the ordinary.

I’d asked him before about double submissive scenes, expressing a great interest in doing some if he would allow it. He told me I needed to learn the basics first, but once I had a grasp on those, he would definitely bring someone in.

He called me up around ten and asked if I still wished to play. He informed me that there was currently a group gathered at his house, but if I wished to play I could still head over. So my roommate and I went down there and there was indeed a rather large group gathered. I met another one of his submissives, a really sweet girl full of lots of energy and hugs.

I got hugs from a few more people, people I’d met the night I had my first session but hadn’t seen since. They’re amazing people really. Once you’re in, you’re in for life. Again though, this is just the people I’ve met, most of whom are college students just trying to find a place in the world.

We chatted casually for a bit before deciding to head to the dungeon, at which point he informed me that another girl there wished to nibble on a girl and he inquired as to whether or not I was up for that. You can bet your ass I was.

Until we got down to the dungeon.

She was quick to enter subspace so he sat her on a bench at the back while he worked me towards it.

Again I was finding it immensely difficult. He had me down in the first/submissive position and just as I was about to slip into subspace, just as he was calming me, guess what he says? “Undress.”

You know that part where you’re not supposed to look at your Master? That went out the window in about two seconds. My head snapped up so fast and I just stared at him, eyes wide, mouth open. I’m sure I looked like a deer in the headlights.

This got me a stern “Why are you looking at me?”

I believe at this point all I managed to do was blink.

“You’re still looking at me.”

I blinked again before I finally shot up from the floor, grabbing his arm, I said something along the lines of “Um, can we talk?” And I led him to the far end of the dungeon and I believe I just blinked at him some more.

He gazed into my eyes and somehow he calmed me down, telling me that everything would be okay. I think I was still so close to the edge of subspace that he was able to easily get me into it and he finally told me that he would have her undress with me so I wasn’t doing it alone. For some odd reason, I was okay with that.

So needless to say, we undressed, handing our clothes to our Master. He realized that I was still not in subspace and he thus set about helping me to enter it. He allowed me to pick any manner of flogger/whip that I wished to play with and he had me bend over the table, setting fifteen strokes on my back, rather gentler than he normally would, as I was not in subspace and it would have hurt immensely if he’d used his usual force.

I finally managed to slip into subspace and the two of us were then informed that we would be suspended together. WOW. Just WOW.

He told us, then, that we were allowed to make-out, but only if he was whipping one of us. If he stopped, we had to stop, otherwise we would be punished.

He walked around us, swishing the whip menacingly before he laid it on us. A few strokes on one, a few strokes on the other. Man, she’s a really good kisser.

Our bodies pressed harder together as we arched into each other, away from the pain. The more intense the pain, the more our bodies pressed together and the harder it was to make-out.

At some point, he told us that we were now allowed to make out whenever we wished so it pretty much became make-out time when we weren’t whipped because we were panting too heavily whenever the whip fell on us to really do much of anything.

On one of his rounds around our bodies, I accidentally looked at him. Normally, I am very good about not looking at him, but for some odd reason it was hard this time. I think it may have had something to do with the fact that I had boobs pressed in my face and I wasn’t too keen on staring am them the whole time. So I looked to the side just as he happened to walk by. I didn’t even mean to look at him. I didn’t even want to. I just didn’t want to look at boobs.

Regardless, he stepped behind me, pulling my hair aside, murmuring in my ear. He told me that while he could not punish me for looking at him earlier because we had not discussed some things, I’d looked at him just now.

And he stated that he would give me twenty-five flogs for it. He started with nine, but my hands were beginning to feel numb so I cried out and told him as much. He adjusted them, adding a length of chain to the hook so I had more to hold on to and a little bit more leeway.

He then began his rounds around us again, stating that in his dungeon, we were to share punishments equally, so for looking at him, my sister (When speaking to one of us, he referred to the other as our ‘sister submissive’ or ‘sister.’) would also receive her twenty-five. I immediately proclaimed that he should not punish her for what I did and that I would take her share. I couldn’t even begin to tell you why I blurted that, but I did. No joke. He asked, then, if it meant that I would take fifty. I told him yes, but then after a brief pause, I stated that I would take her punishment, but only if she wished it. He asked her if she would take her share and she said yes. So I was let off the hook. Thank God.

Well he seemed to forget (thought probably not on accident) that I had already received nine, and thus he started on me again. He did the same crisscross motion that he has done during previous lessons, meaning four times the impacts. He gave me ten strokes, then moved around and gave her ten. I don’t quite remember how he laid the rest of the strokes, but I do know that at some point, he was beside us, whipping us both at the same time.

When he finished that again, I realized my hands were once again going numb and instead of fixing it, he decided to end our suspension time. He unhooked my arms and I nearly felt like I was going to fall off the tire. I’m terrified of heights so even though it was only a foot off the ground, I started hyperventilating.

He grabbed me from behind and held me, telling me I was safe, that he wouldn’t let me fall. He told me to wrap my arms around my sister’s waist and then he proceeded to let go, at which point I freaked out again. He unhooked one of her arms so that she was able to hold me and she kissed my head and whispered that it was going to be okay.

He unhooked her other arm and she wrapped it around me, continuing to whisper as he unhooked our legs. He lifted me off of the tire and set me on the ground where I regained my balance and calmed.

I was surprised to find myself very…wet (for lack of a better, more pristine term) as I stood in the middle of the floor, waiting for instruction.

And this is where things got super fun. It was time for sensation play! My favorite!

I asked him how he wished me to lay on the table and he told me to choose. I said I wished to lay on my stomach as I rather like things being done to my back, at which point he informed me that if I laid on my back, he would allow my sister to play with my nipples. So I lay on my back.

He brought out the blindfold, the one that blocks out any manner of light and keeps your eyes shut. After it was secured, he then informed me that he was proud of me today and that he would now allow me to be collared. He also said that because he was so proud of me, I would be allowed to wear the collar whenever I entered his dungeon. I love that damn collar.

It’s like a regular dog collar, only heavier and when I’m in subspace, the clasp feels so cold against my skin. It’s amazing.

At this point he pulled out various implements, allowing my sister to use some as well. There were moments in time when I was unable to tell who was doing what. The only very obvious one was when he used the leather gloves, manhandling my body.

And he was definitely using the satin scarf because she would definitely not have wrapped it over my mouth the way he did. I don’t know why I find it so erotic to be unable to speak, to have my moans muffled.

At some point, he gave her permission to begin teasing my nipples and she leaned down, suckling on them gently, grazing her teeth over them.

He asked me if I liked watching a girl orgasm and I told him very truthfully that I didn’t know, as I had never seen it (I’ve only ever had one serious girlfriend and the sex was, well, bland.). He then asked if I wished to watch it and for reasons I don’t even know, I said “I guess.”

He left to set up the Sybian, the giant vibrator that I believe he said is somewhere around 18 horsepower. I know it was in the teens.

My sister was allowed to continue playing with me and let me tell you, she’s damn good at using some of those implements. I believe at this point, the only one she used was the tiny hammer with the five pins in the head.

And the most erotic part? It got to the point where my breaths became dependent on the hammer’s contact with my skin. I let out a quiet pant each time it fell, becoming still as soon as it lifted. And these were nothing more than quick taps each.

When he finished setting it up, he gave her instructions as to how she was to sit on it. As they weren’t directed at me, I was barely paying attention. What I do know is that he put her on the one that’s mean specifically for stimulating the clit.

I was to position myself on my knees behind her, doing what I could to help her orgasm as she rode the Sybian (It literally is riding. It’s a large hump on the ground that you straddle and then it vibrates with you on it. It’s really freaky.). Basically this consisted of sitting behind her, planting kisses on her back, my arms wrapped around her torso, my hands playing with her nipples.

I can safely tell you that I was out of subspace by this point and frankly I was feeling nothing whatsoever. I don’t think my Master realized I was no longer in subspace, but he should realize that any talk of orgasm or sexual activity immediately snaps me out of it. My mind has some sort of trigger words or something, little mental red flags that tell me I need to be on my guard, something highly impossible if still in subspace.

So the thought of being naked, pressed against her, no longer turned me on because in the real world (a.k.a. outside subspace) this girl just doesn’t turn me on. It’s nothing against her, it’s just a fact of life. And I’m actually almost positive I don’t turn her on either. Which begs the question why I agreed to this in the first place?

For some odd reason, I was compelled to allow this activity to continue. She was still in subspace and I mean I decided to just play along. It wouldn’t really have been fair to her to cut it short. Though I’m not so sure it was fair to continue in such a disinterested manner either.

So she rode it to orgasm (Although he would not allow her to orgasm until she asked him and if she merely said ‘please’ he promised that he would shut the machine off and not let her orgasm at all.). Then I was told to move around the front and the process was repeated.

The third time, he told me I was to determine when she was allowed to orgasm and she had to look me in the eyes while she did. Let me just say that it was VERY hard not to look at HIM at this point. I thought this was rather ridiculous, but I played along, although not for very long. I made her wait like a minute before I let her orgasm, stating merely “Cum for me” in a hushed voice as she rode it out.

And then I held her and kissed her when she finished. It just seemed appropriate.

Don't forget, for full, unedited posts, stop by Kay's blog; A Life Beneath. Until next time, have fun and play safe! <3

~Sin

Giving You Something Sweet to Suck On: An Experiment

I love food. Really, I do.
And we all know I love sex.
(Even though sometimes I tend to love food more than sex...)

So, today, lets talk about food, and lets talk about sex.
Let's talk about aphrodisiacs.

An aphrodisiac is any food, drink, herb, or whatever digestible item you please, that is said to boost the libido or "get you in the mood".

Let start with a quick list. These are the most popular.

Asparagus
Oysters
Avocado
Chocolate
Pomegranate
Sweet Potato
Chili Powder/Cayenne Pepper
Basil Bananas
Figs
Garlic (woot!)
Strawberries


**Educational Note: The supposedly super sexifying liquid called "Spanish Fly" is not a good thing to go for. The store bought kind you get is really just chili powder and sugar water. Actual Spanish Fly is a mixture made from a certain kind of ground up beetle, and it is LETHAL. The idea behind it was once that these beetles released a kind of toxin that, when urinated later on, irritated the urethra, sometimes causing a tingling sensation or stimulation in the surrounding area. But this shit is deadly, so don't waste your money on the crap at the store, and don't waste your health on the real shit.**


Now, it's been debated back and forth whether or not aphrodisiac foods actually work, so instead of telling you they do, I decided to conduct an experiment.

Let's try them out.

It's obvious that just downing a shitload of mashed sweet potatoes isn't going to make me feel like a sex goddess, so lets take them a few of them one by one and see what we can do.

Twice a week over the next two weeks (starting next week) I'm going to head to the store and grab one of these foods. That day I'll take it home, find a recipe for it, set a sexy mood around the house, and see if eating a meal focused on that food gets me a little more in the mood than usual.
In my post I'll explain the food, it's tastes and uses, along with the recipes I used, and how the night went afterward.

Sound boring? Not for me. :-D And I'll do my best to make it worth your while.


Like the idea of mixing dinner with pleasure? Then tune in later on in mid-october for a post focused on just that! "Eating In While Eating Out" (entitled by Bell), is my next food-based project, so make sure to come back next month!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Don't forget to send me you're Sexy Post-Its! Read the rules HERE and send them to me ASAP at SinSekret at Gmail dot Com for you're chance to win some nifty prizes!!

Here's another one of the awesome entries I've gotten! (I decided to keep them anonymous, for when voting time comes along.)

Keep 'em coming!!!

My First Lesson :: by Kay

Dear reader, I'd like to mention that this piece is not edited very much at all. It's been edited and shortened just a bit, but I decided not to edit much of this part because of how much information and terminology it contains. I think this is a greatly erotic and educational part, so I decided it would be better to leave it whole, offering you as much as possible. It is a good post though, so please do enjoy.

~Sin

My First Lesson

Part Two of the Submission by Kay series.

My first lesson started rather unexpectedly. After we’d discussed various manners of items on the shelves and he tested my reaction to various levels of whips and sharp implements, he decided it was time to show me the positions.

There are six basic positions that all reputable dominants use. They are all numbered and named, but I am going to be completely honest and say that the only one that I remember right now is the first position, the submissive position. I remember the names of all the others and how to do them, but I won’t know if he gives me a numbered command and that honestly scares the hell out of me.

What I do know is that the first position is on your knees, bottom seated on your feet, head turned down so that you are looking at your Master/Mistresses knees if they are standing right in front of you. Dominants vary as to where they want the hands positioned. Some say hands clasped behind the back. My Master believes this to be a position that is far too relaxed so he has me clasp my hands behind my neck. Oh and I almost forgot, my knees have to be separated, spread slightly to keep my crotch open- a vulnerability thing I believe. And of course, my posture has to be perfect; neat and erect.

The other positions, in no particular order (as I have said I do not remember the order) are present your breasts, present your crotch, present your ass, present your mouth, and present your back.

Present your breasts is a fun one. I kind of rather like that one. You get down as if you were going into submissive position, except knees are clamped together, feet are crossed at the ankles and your bottom is not resting on your feet. You stick your chest out as far as you can, placing your breasts on display for your Master/Mistresses review and of course for various activities and possible nipple clamping. For this one he has me keep my hands on my neck…I think…Oh shit.

Present your crotch is not one I am particularly fond of, nor is it one that I remember very well. So as soon as I relearn it, I will explain what it is and I will probably tell you the punishment that I end up receiving for not remembering my lessons.

Present your ass is when you get down on your knees. Clasp your fingers together and lay your palms on the floor. Rest your head on your hands so that you are unable to see your Master/Mistress unless they walk within your limited area of peripheral vision and stick your ass out as far into the air as you can. I don’t really like my ass so this position may not end up very high on my list of favorite things to do during lessons.

Present your mouth is another one I don’t remember. Shit. Shit. Shit. I believe I need to research on the internet. What I do know is that you open your mouth as wide as you can…vertically, never horizontally, to show off what a pretty mouth you have and to allow your Dominant to place a gag in your mouth. I do know that it requires the same hand position as present your ass…at least I think it does. Ok well I know you have to keep your eyes shut.

Present your back is very similar to present your ass. Hands clasped, head on hands. Your knees, however, are pressed all the way up so that they touch your hands and your back is arched as nicely in the air as you are able to get it. As I have scoliosis, I do not believe my Master will be using this position very often. Actually that’s a bit of a shame, as I love things being done to my back and I know that would be a good receiving position.

Then came wax play. He told me to stand and remove my shirt and my bra. I was hesitant, but I did as I was told, learning a new lesson in the process: Always take care of your clothes. I was to fold them neatly and hand them to him. Oh and of course my eyes were downcast. You are not to look at your Master unless you have permission and trust me, that is very rare permission to receive.

He cuffed my ankles and wrists to the table. He also allowed me to wear a heavy collar, a cool, large, metal ring clamped tightly around my neck. (And you must always thank your Master when they collar you. It is a very high privilege.)

We moved up three more levels I believe. I actually kind of lost count after a while. Subspace is intense. (Subspace is the area of your head you go into to be able to deal with that kind of pain and take it as pleasure. You lose yourself in your mind, concentrating not on what happened, or on what will happen, but what is happening at that exact moment, nothing more.) So each layer burned worse, even though there was already a nice coat of wax on my back by the time he got to the hottest. Mind you, the ‘beginner’ candle came after two of his own and it still burned. But he was proud of me for making it to that level and he allowed me to move up one more step. Which is where I finally said the ‘safe word.’

(For those of you who don’t know, it is absolutely necessary to have a ‘safe word’ in a relationship of this nature so that if your pain threshold is pushed too far, you can call things to a stop before it reaches a dangerous level. Never use the word ‘stop’, as it is a word people will naturally say when in pain and do not always mean. ‘Red’ is usually used to mean that the pain has become too much and you want that level to stop, but you do not want the activity to cease altogether.)

He clutched me and said “You are safe.” At this point, mind you, I was panting slightly and I had to calm down a bit because the pain had reached that slightly unbearable level.

He knew I liked knife play and he was planning to remove the wax with a knife, but as I had said the ‘safe word’ he asked if I still wanted him to. Of course I did. It felt amazing, feeling the cool blade on my back after the heat of the wax. I wanted to shiver, but at the same time I was just so…warm.

We fell into a silence as he worked, his hands working in tandem with the blade to ease the wax off my back. In all honesty, it felt like I’d just gotten a massage, the heat having eased all the tension from my body. Not to mention the fact that I felt like I was in this Zen-like mode, all thoughts gone, barely hearing the dull hum of the water heater nearby.

When he finished with the knife, he ran a scrubber over my back. It felt like sandpaper across my sensitive back but it felt so good, in a way I couldn’t even begin to explain. Who knew something that felt like sandpaper could cause my body to ache with a certain hunger.

Wow, thinking on it, I know he did a few more things, but I really cannot remember the order he went in. I do know that he ran a wheeled, jagged blade over my back and it felt like a constant knife over my skin, sharp against the sensitive heat he had already created. (Mind you, he had run that blade across my skin before in the introductory phase, and it felt no worse than a cat scratch. It was amazing how much it was intensified by the heat.) He also blew across my back, causing the hairs on the back of my neck to rise, my body wishing to arch against the bondage as I whimpered softly. I remember my eye lids fluttering shut, the feel like a cool breeze after an excruciatingly hot day.

And then he whipped me with his middle intensity whip. Ten strokes and I had to count them out loud and thank him after each one. I winced as the leather hit my back, realizing that I did wish to thank him for being so kind to me, for allowing me to feel the things I wanted to feel and some things I didn’t even know I wanted to feel until he fulfilled the silent requests for me.

I’ve never felt so vulnerable in my life. And yet I’ve never felt so safe.

When we finished, we had Cool Down time, a necessary part of any good Dom/Sub relationship. It is a time to bring the submissive back from subspace, to ease their mind back into the world, out of their heads, their place of such intense vulnerability.

He wrapped me in a blanket and led me upstairs. At this point, my friend joined us again and we all cuddled on the couch, my friend wrapped tightly around me, purring in my ear, nuzzling against my side, both of them making sure I felt safe. Just safe. And eventually my mind did ease back into the real world, to coherent thoughts and time slipped by so quickly. I’d been in subspace for nearly two hours and Cool Down time was about that long, but each felt like nothing more than ten minutes. Which makes me wonder what time really is.

Continued next week with The Second Session...

Don't forget to check out Kay's full blog: A Life Beneath.

Related Posts: Beginning a Journey, Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones but Whips and Chains Excite Me

Beginning a Journey :: by Kay

**Editor's Note:: I think it's important to mention that Kay has not always been in the "BDSM" culture or lifestyle. While we have often discussed and debated about the sexual elements since we met, it is something she has sort of fallen into. Every person interested in BDSM has started, lived, and continued or stopped participated in their activities for different reasons. Sometimes it's an innate longing, sometimes curiosity, force, etc. There is no right way, there are no (or very few) wrong ways, and as Bell said so wonderfully, everyone is unique and beautiful and they're meant to be that way.

Anyway. Here is post #1, and from now on I'll post one from her every Sunday afternoon. Enjoy! <3>

Intro, Of Sorts
by Kay
Part One of the Submission by Kay series.

Here is what I know:

For the longest time I was a cutter. In a very loose sense of the word. I never broke the skin. There was just something about dragging the sharp edge of something along my bare flesh that filled a part of me. My physical pain, I found, had the ability to match my emotional pain. I had concrete evidence that I was, indeed, hurting. But it was evidence only for myself. I had scratches on my body, sure, but they were in places that I could easily cover with clothing. No one else could know. Unless I wanted them to. And a part of me wanted them to make the effort to discover those scratches, but no one ever did. So my outlet was temporary because after a while, the fact that no one ever noticed began to cause me more pain.

I began to tell people. And then I realized that I was having to defend my status as a “cutter.” I didn’t break skin. My injuries meant nothing. While self-inflicted, they meant nothing compared to the many people who drew blood. Who made scars. I was never one for blood.

But I kept doing it, kept dragging sharp edges across the skin, my tears stopping as I felt a jagged edge dragged across my thigh.

And then one day it just went too far. I won’t get into the details because I’m sure you’d rather not know them. Personally, I’d rather not know them but it’s something I’m forced to live with.

At any rate, I tried rather unsuccessfully to slit my wrist with a razor but I chickened out when the skin broke. It stung too much. So instead I downed a bottle of pills, then ran down the hall to get help.

And suddenly people cared. People wanted to know why.

And that was when I stopped knowing why.

I went to a therapist. And even now, almost two years later, I’m still seeing the same woman. And I’ve still barely scratched the surface of my problems. Pun intended.

A few weeks ago I moved in to my new place.

I had a huge fight with my parents the day I was slated to move out and it ended with me in tears, practically hyperventilating as I sped down the road, my car loaded with all manner of boxes.

My roommate invited her friend over that night. We started talking about sex, as my friends and I are very open about our sex lives and our preferences in the bedroom (in fact, the few that know about this endeavor of mine are very supportive of it!).

I don’t know how the subject came up, I mean specifically…I know how it eventually came up, knowing my friends the way I do. At any rate, I mentioned at some point that I enjoy knife play. Which, at that point in time was a lie. Not a complete lie. I rather did like the idea of knife play. I’d just never…played…before.

Let’s just say the night got better as the guy pulled his knife out and began to drag it across my skin. I’d never felt anything like it. I mean…I had, obviously as I’d formerly done stuff like it to myself…but it was something completely new now. It felt different to have someone else in control of the blade, to control how long it dragged or where it dragged. And I found it highly, highly erotic.

He dragged it over my nipples, over my stomach, my neck, pressing the cool blade into my skin, leaving beautiful pink scratch marks in its wake, marks that I would begin to feel alarmingly proud of.

He tied my wrists together and I found myself unable to clutch anything, barely able to writhe comfortably as he continued to drag that blade. And it was even more erotic. My body felt hot, the space between my legs aching terribly. Pain had become pleasure.

He came back a couple days later, his manner more forceful, pressing me against walls, slamming my face into the bed, tugging my hair. But the more he did, the more I began to enjoy myself. It was intense. It was insane. And it felt so wrong that it began to feel so right. He gave me more scratch marks and this time, I found them accompanied by nice blue bruises, some of those bruises still visible even now.

I was hooked.

Days later, my roommate took me to a friend’s house. She’d told me a lot about him and his girlfriend and the lifestyle they have. His girlfriend and my roommate are like sisters and she gladly showed me their “dungeon,” a basement with a large table at one end and all manner of suspension gear along the other, not to mention an entire wall lined with shelves covered in any manner of toys and devices necessary for their lifestyle.

Later that night, I got into a discussion with her boyfriend and I found myself practically drooling at the thought of working with them. I asked if he would train me and he readily agreed to, offering to go ahead and take me down to the basement for further discussion, including in depth descriptions of the toys and implements.

Later, there was more.

To be continued...(next Sunday)...

**This is an edited version of Kay's first post on her new blog, A Life Beneath. For the full version (not much is cut out, but there are more posts) you're welcome to visit her blog.

Or just stop by here next Sunday for her next post, "My First Lesson".**

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More Self Lovin

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The Art of Self Lovin

Currently Reading: Guide To Getting It On!

This is part two of my Self Gratification Trilogy. You may want to head back to part one, Does God Really Kill Kittens? If not, on with the show!

Quick Disclaimer: Many links in this post lead to more sexually graphic sites with nudity and realistic sexual products. While I work hard to keep Sin's Secret PG-13, some links have more R/NC-17 images. I am not responsible if you find a link or product you feel is inappropriate. Just FYI.

May is National Masturbation Month!
Let's take advantage of this time to focus on Self Gratification; what it is, how it's done, and what's so awesome of it!

The dictionary defines masturbation as:

1.	the stimulation or manipulation of one's own genitals, esp. to orgasm; sexual self-gratification.

Fun fun fun.

Masturbation is really just getting yourself "off" sexually, whether by means of your hand, an inanimate object (such as a candle, etc), an adult toy (i.e. a vibrator or sleeve), or sometimes another persons hand (although that's no quite masturbation any more).

As I said in Part 1, masturbation has a pretty bad rep. It's seen as gross, pathetic, and desperate, which is how it's usually portrayed in movies and television. It gives the idea that you wouldn't have to masturbate if you could get anything different, and treated like a loser's alternative to sex.

That is so far from the truth. Personally, I've been in a relationship for almost 8 months now, and a month hasn't gone by where I didn't masturbate at least twice. Even my boyfriend admits to masturbating every now and then. It's actually especially helpful when we want our sexual activities to last a little longer, because finishing first without my help can help prolong his performance.
Really, people have to acknowledge and understand the idea that masturbation isn't just a pathetic release. It is healthy, safe, STD and Heartbreak free, and can be done any time you want (although I will assert that it is rude to do it anywhere that is not private, unless those around you are okay with you doing it).

Being that it is National Masturbation Month, lets use this sequel post to go over some of the techniques of masturbation.

Once I started the techniques for women, I just couldn't stop writing. I'll try to trim it down, but I might have to turn this into a quartet....>.< (and yes, the product images link back to a site you can buy them at)


Masturbation techniques for women:

It's a common misconception that women don't masturbate. That it's a boy thing and girls don't like (or need) sex or sexual pleasure "the way guys do". I'll talk about this more in Part 2/3, for now lets get on to the fun parts.

There are all kinds of ways to "get yourself off". The two basics, using your hands (and maybe lubricant to make everything slippery and easy), are just that; basic, stepping stones to bigger and better things.
So lets get started (we won't finish yet). We'll just do two basic ones for each gender here, and continue on in part 2.

*The Faucet Method.
This was my first experience with masturbation. You can interpret that however you'd like, but it was. After having the horrible suspicion that something was sexually wrong with me, I scoured the world wide web for techniques to...try myself out, and "practice" my sexuality. (I actually had to tell myself I was "practicing", so I didn't feel like I was actually masturbating, because that would have been shameful, even though nobody knew or anything)
This involves you, your clitoris, and a bathtub.

Start out by laying in your bathtub (long ways), with your legs over the short edge, or up against the wall (a great stretching technique, btw), your hips positioned so your pubic area is right below the faucet.
This can be a bit frustrating or uncomfortable at first, but it gets better and easier as you adjust.

Turn on the water.
Now, if you're a beginnger, or have an especially sensitive clitoris or vaginal area (for example, Bell claims to not really be able to do this because she's so sensitive), you may want to start the water on really low, or position yourself so that the water is hitting the area between your inner thigh and other labia (lip), and raise the pressure as or move yourself as you adjust.

Temperature wise, I typically start with warm water or hot water (be very careful if you're not used to too much heat; I love the heat), then raise it for a while before adding in cold- because after a while the temperature doesn't really matter, all you can feel is the sensation. And hopefully those sensations will be fantastic.

Just keep yourself there and adjust the water and your position as feelings grow and change.
Before I started using a vibrator (and for a while after as well), this was my favorite form of masturbation. I love the warmth and the feeling.

(This can also be done with a detachable shower head. And it's much more comfy. Those things rock.

*Foreign Objects.
This is really my broad term for the use of any foreign object (physical object, not like...literature or porn) to stimulate the "pleasure spots". The most popular items are dildos and vibrators. (But I've heard of women using crazy stuff from candles to cucumbers, beer bottles to cell phones, Popsicles to teddy bears to lobsters. Yeah, I said lobsters. You don't want to know.

Anyway. I've tried dildos and vibrators (like the Power Bullet-my review), and as I've said, vibrators are my favorite. I just don't get internal stimulation like most people. Vibrator provide gentle to strong sensations of pulses, waves, and constant buzzing to your clitoris to create stimulation and cause orgasm. You put it there, move it around, and orgasm. (although it tends to be more difficult than that) Sounds simple, right?

Then there are the other clitoral stimulation toys. Such as the Clit Massager over there. These use different sensations to stimulate the clitoris, such as sucking motions. Tends to try to stimulate oral sex. I've never used one, but this one on the side is totally on my wish list.

Dildos tend to be a bit more complicated, but yet also much more simple. It's just a stick used either to rub along the clitoris or insert into the vagina for vaginal and g-spot stimulation. The insertion form pretty much aims to simulate the act of sex itself, using the dildo as a substitute for the penis. So typically you insert it, and move it with a circular or thrusting motion. Often used mostly to push against the "g-spot" for that particular type of orgasm.
You'll often find vibrating dildos, which combine the shapes, devices, and uses of vibrators and dildos. Much better, to me, than a plain dildo.
Then there are also the step up from the vibrating dildo; the Rabbit. There are all kinds of rabbits now, especially due to a popularity boom after their appearance on Sex & The City a few years back. There are penis shaped dildos with a rabbit shaped vibrator attached to the top; often with many speeds, functions, and little add ons like spinning heads, vibrating beads around the middle, and little ears to get both sides of your clitoris. I've got a more detailed post on the Wascally Wabbit Vibe here.

Masturbation techniques for men:

Unfortunately for men, there's essentially only one basic and typical form of masturbation for men. Pretty much that just involves stroking the penis until orgasm. This is most often called "Jacking Off", which is a term I'm not particularly fond of, but whatever.

*Basic Hand Technique
This is pretty much how every guy who masturbates masturbates. At least, as far as I've been able to tell.
This involves the man cupping this hand around his penis and thrusting it back and forth. Lubricant can be used, along with some kind of barrier to keep from making a mess, but that's about it.

For those few guys who haven't masturbated- I doubt there's any reading this, but hey, I'll go into it anyway- this happens by gripping your penis fully, and stroking yourself back and forth. The idea is to imitate the way the penis thrusts in and out of the vagina.

I wish there was more I could say about this, but I don't know enough guys to really have gone into depth about the process of male masturbation. Sorry.
But there is a really interesting (and sexually graphic, so watch out!) site with different strokes, positions, etc for guys. But watch out, it is really graphic, 18+ please.

*Masturbation Sleeves

These are strange (yet absolutely ingenious) devices created to mimic the feel and function of a vagina, and often the sucking sensation of oral sex.

There's a picture (w/ link) of a very basic one to the right there; just a plastic tube that's tight at the entrance, and (i believe) ridged inside to provide sensation. With this you just insert your penis and pump it back and forth, much like you would do with your hand, but with a more sexually realistic feeling.
Below there's another one that's more complex, made of silicone with lots of ridges, bumps, textures, and areas of tightness. This one is the same, insert penis and thrust.

Then there are vibrating ones, more realistic ones that actually look like vaginas. Novelty ones like Pussy In a Can are popular too, and you can sometimes get them at stores like Spencer's. There are curved ones, jelly ones, electric ones, anal ones, and even some to imitate oral sex. I told you, they're pretty ingenious.

To be continued....

That's all for now. Please leave a comment with some feedback and ideas, I'm really a bit brain dead on this subject and I'd really like to write the things that you want to hear about.



Related Posts: Does God Really Kill Kittens?, Adult Product of the Week- Wabbit,